Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Mcdonalds' New Bacon Clubhouse Burger

I couldn't decide what to eat for dinner last night. Then, after hours of heavy introspective thinking, decided it was time to honor the fans who requested we review this burger, and I headed out to Mcdonalds. The last few times I've hit up Mickey D's, the second I rolled down my window, I got hit with the super bored, I-want-to-kill-myself robotic question, "thankyouforcomingtomcdonaldswouldyouliketotryourbaconclubhouseburger" and I was psyched for once to be able to say "YES. YES I THINK I WOULD." And of course they didn't ask me. I would have made their day.

Anyway, I ordered it up and headed back to the house to take pictures and eat in the comfort of my home. Then I remembered that I had taken the house key off my keychain when I went for a walk earlier (yea, I know- a walk? come on). I quickly found out nobody would be home for about 40 minutes and I panicked. My phone was at 6%, I had nothing to drink, my food was already getting cold, and it was dark outside, meaning I couldn't really take decent pictures. I made the command decision to heat the burger up later, and I just drove around for awhile.

When I was finally let in, a trip for delicious burritos was presented, and I briefly contemplated accepting my fate of a burgerless night. Burritos would be delicious, but I had already spent money on a stupid burger that was probably now terrible, and even though I bought it for dinner, I mostly bought it for this here blog. I decided to take a bite of the burger as it was, and if it was good enough, I would heat it up in the microwave and eat it for dinner, realizing that of course it would probably be terrible, and I could use that as an excuse to just get a delicious burrito and cut my losses for the night.

I was wrong. Right away I knew that this burger was a delicious burger, and not only that- it showed so much promise that I knew in my heart of hearts that a reheating wouldn't take a thing away from it. So after 45 minutes of sitting in my cold car, I heated it up and tore in.

I opened the box to reveal the fakest looking bun I've ever seen (well maybe not). This looked like a squeak toy!


Opening it up, I saw pretty solid looking lettuce, a huge tomato slice (sliced in half for some reason), crisp applewood-smoked bacon, and delicious white cheddar cheese.

The bottom was a mess of caramelized onions and special sauce. 

And inside was beef that looked like... well, actual beef.

To recap: 

It's the ingredients that make it so tasty! (isn't that true of everything?)

And was it? Hell yea it was. Screw burritos- this reheated burger that was probably reheated before I even got it hit the spot big time. 

don't get confused by my massive hands, this is a full sized burger

I actually decided to get rid of the lettuce- both because it was distracting a little from everything else, and because my microwaving had rendered it pretty soggy. But the bacon was crisp and awesome and the tomato was very prevalent, which seems to be rare these days, and for someone who loves tomato like me, ruled. The rest kind of blended in with itself, for the most part. The burger was really good- surprisingly good actually, especially for McDonalds. It was really good meat- Five Guys might have to be worried. The cheese was there but kind of blended in, and the special sauce was awesome. On the box, it just says "special sauce," and while eating, I was wondering if it was a different version of Big Mac sauce. As someone who doesn't like pickles on burgers and doesn't like getting ripped off (come on, it's just a double cheeseburger with more bread), I never get Big Macs, so I couldn't tell- my guess was that it was the standard Big Mac sauce but without the 4 pounds of ground up pickles, and maybe even a cheese sauce added in. But according to Mcdonalds' website, it's just Big Mac sauce, which, as you all know, is their somewhat different take on Thousand Island dressing. Whatever it was, it was delicious. I felt it went extraordinarily well with the meat, cheese, tomato and roll, which had that buttered-bun flavor all the Wendy's burgers now have (which I normally don't like that much, but the sauce made it awesome). Also, this bun was just flat out really good.

And even better, there was a good amount of sauce on both sides of the bun. This burger was a mess, and that's how I like it. As someone who gets a side of sauce with nearly everything I eat (so I can dip), I didn't need that with this. FINALLY a burger has the right amount of sauce. 

My only complaint with this was the onions. I don't typically get onions on burgers, even if they're the kind that are cooked in caramel. But Mcdonalds has done a great job with these onions, on the retired and awesome CBO and on their great value menu item, the Grilled Onion Cheddar Burger (which I used for the greatest creation ever here). So I was psyched about these onions, and they just didn't really do it for me on this burg. The Big Mac sauce mixed with a really large tomato brought out an acidic tomato sweetness, and the onion was either not from a good batch, or that flavor just didn't really work with the other ingredients. The only time I noticed the onions was when my mouth was saying "why did they add onions to this? This doesn't need onions." I would have preferred this without them. I just feel like the different flavors would have worked together better. 

But the bottom line is, this is a great burger. All the ingredients on mine were fresh and awesome, and everything worked great together (other than the onions). Even reheated 45 minutes after it was fresh, I really don't have a bad thing to say about this. Mcdonalds has done a great job. And it's a quarter pound patty and I believe $4.75, so it's reasonably priced and a solid meal. 

I give this an A- and I expect you to go buy one. 

-review by Mike

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Thursday, April 3, 2014

Triple Cookie review! Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Creations!

Chips Ahoy has a pretty solid track record with the Fatguyfoodblog crew. We might not really care about the originals. I mean, sure they will do in a pinch, but who really sets out to buy a package of regular Chips Ahoy these days? Nobody I know. But when they do something new and limited edition? That's where they really shine. Hell, one of our most talked about reviews of all time came from them. Remember this one?

So when our readers started messaging us begging for a review of the new Chips Ahoy ICE CREAM CREATIONS line of cookies...well you know we started hitting the stores as soon as possible.

So let's get right to it! Starting with....
Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Creations: Dulce de Leche!

First thing you notice when you crack the bag open is a strong caramel smell. That was a good sign, strong smell usually means strong taste. But from the moment you pick one of these up you know it's all downhill from there. These cookies are hard as hell. They seem like a regular Chip's Ahoy hardness at first, until you hit the weird caramel areas. Then it becomes almost as if there's a large chunk of hard toffee infused into the middle of the thing. Taste-wise they aren't bad. They just seem like a hard toffee cookie that has an occasional sweet chip in it.

But you can see from the picture that they aren't bursting with chips like it shows on the bag. All in all I would say these aren't terrible if you don't mind a hard cookie. But overall, a bit of a disappointment. If you're a fan of caramel/toffee and hard cookies you might enjoy these a lot. But if you're looking for a cookie that won't crack your windshield if you pitch one at it...these probably aren't for you. I'm going to give them a C-.

Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Creations: Mint Chocolate Chip...

Now these cookies had me excited. In my old age, as my taste buds become more refined, I find myself enjoying the simpler things. While part of me still loves an ice cream loaded to the brim with candy and sweet goo, I have to say my favorite ice cream tends to be Mint Chocolate Chip. The king of mint chocolate chip ice cream in my opinion comes from New Englands own, Brighams. If you ever get a chance to try it, I highly, HIGHLY recommend it. But how did these cookies measure up? Well...They are pretty damn good! They are your standard soft, chocolate Chips Ahoy cookie, but with chocolate and mint chips. So there's an overwhelming chocolate flavor at all times that is suddenly interrupted with blast of sweet mint. 

I found that it was quite easy to eat an absurd amount of these. Partially because they were delicious and partially because they suffer from the age old problem that all Chips Ahoy cookies do...they are too small. But in the end, I really liked these and would have to say, if you are a mint/chocolate fan, you NEED these cookies. I'm giving them a solid B+!

And finally...
Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Creations: Root Beer Float.

There's no really nice way to say this so I'm just going to throw it out there. These cookies are gross. The second you rip open the bag you can smell root beer. But the weird part is, the second the smell hit my nose I knew that they weren't going to be good. It was unnatural. Some part of my brain started sending out alerts, letting me know that I shouldn't even try these. But...being a food blogger. I did my duty, and sweet mother of Christ were they gross. Root beer is not a flavor that should be infused into a cookie. That's the bottom line. These are an unholy abomination.

Don't get me wrong. They DO taste like Root Beer. They accomplished what they set out to do, they just shouldn't have done it. These cookies were so bad that I wondered if maybe it was just something weird with me. So I did an experiment over a few days and everyone who stopped by, I asked to try one. Out of 9 people, only 1 finished an entire cookie. The rest took one bite and threw the rest away. A couple of them even spit out that one bite.
So don't be surprised when I say these cookies get an F.
But it doesn't end there. They were so bad that we had to take it to the next level. Enjoy this video...

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See you next week!

Thursday, March 27, 2014


There are times when here at Fatguyfoodblog our readers will message us about things we should review. Before these new Ben & Jerry's flavors had even hit stores we were getting emails, tweets, and facebook messages sent at us like crazy, every single day. People wanted our review of these in the worst way. But as luck would have it, we weren't able to find them in our area until recently. We scoured every store within a 40 mile radius. But finally I tracked them down at a local Hannaford and felt like a complete slob buying five pints of ice cream at once. It wouldn't have been so bad if I had been using a basket or cart. But since I was juggling them in my arms trying not to drop them, I looked like a bumbling fat moron who was about to have a really high calorie evening. 

But let's get right to it. Here you go, your review of the Ben & Jerry's CORE flavors. Starting with...

So the gimmick with this ice cream line is that it's two separate flavors with a middle core of some kind of flavorful goo. With this one we get Chocolate and Hazelnut ice cream with fudge chips and a Hazelnut Fudge Core. Translation: Half Chocolate with chips, half tasteless ice cream, with a weird almost-Nutella glob in the middle. Sounds great right? was alright. I found that if I just ate the ice cream alone, I was bored of this incredibly fast. But then I'd find myself eating too much of the core at once. It was very hard to regulate.

Now even though I wanted to keep eating the core, it wasn't that great. It was like the generic version of Nutella. It resembled it in a lot of ways but paled in comparison. It was a little on the gritty side.
All in all, I give Hazed & Confused a C-.

Next up... Karamel Sutra CORE!

Chocolate and caramel ice creams with fudge chips and a soft caramel core. Sounds great, right? Well...kinda. You see, chocolate ice cream with fudge chips, it's okay. Caramel ice cream? It pretty much sucks. It doesn't have a strong enough flavor so it's like you are eating a tasteless ice cream. You can tell it's sweet but beyond that, nothing. The core was much more gooey than Hazed & Confused though.

A waterfall of caramel! 
Yep, the problem with this flavor is that the nearly liquid caramel core is the best part of it, so the rest of the ice cream bums you out. I realized multiple times how annoyed I was that I had to dig through the tasteless caramel ice cream to get to more caramel core. Two pints into the five I'm starting to think that this is a completely flawed design.
Karamel Sutra CORE gets a C.


Chocolate and peanut butter ice creams with mini peanut butter cups and a peanut butter fudge core. I nearly cheered out loud when I read this description in the store. It sounds like everything I could ever desire. Was it though? Not quite. But don't take that as a bad thing! Unlike in the previous two flavors, this one spreads its extra ingredient throughout both flavors of ice cream. There were plenty of mini peanut butter cups to go around, so even though I wasn't getting much out of the peanut butter ice cream (very subtle flavor), I was still happy to score so many of those little cups. The weirdest part of this pint, though, was the core.

For some reason I was expecting the middle of this to be a giant wad of pure delicious peanut butter. Sadly, that's not what it ended up being. It's still delicious, but it's more like a chocolate/peanut butter fudge vein. It was pretty thick and kind of hard to get a little of each part of this ice cream on your spoon at once. But it was quite delicious for the peanut butter lovers out there. This third pint gets the highest rating of the bunch so far with a B+!

Up next... THAT'S MY JAM CORE!

Chocolate and raspberry ice creams with fudge chips and a raspberry core. Now, I know what you're thinking. "Who the hell thought fruit was a good idea in a Ben & Jerry's." I KNOW RIGHT?! I was dreading this one. But then I learned a lesson that I seem to have to relearn every once in a while. Fruit flavored ice creams aren't all that bad at all! In fact, my biggest complaint about the previous pints was that one side of them had no flavor beyond sweet. Well this one definitely does! The raspberry and chocolate together was really good. 

And the raspberry jam core was a burst of tart sweetness that rounded it out nicely. I would say that this one ties up the Peanut Butter Fudge Core. I'm giving That's My Jam a B+!

And finally... SALTED CARAMEL CORE...

Sweet Cream ice cream with blond brownies and a salted caramel core. This one is definitely the weirdest flavor of the bunch. The rest seem like they were either a direct repackaging of an existing flavor or something close to it. But this one brings Blondie's and salted caramel into the Ben & Jerry's Universe. This one is also a bit strange because there aren't two flavors of ice cream here, just the one. But it works quite well. The sweet cream ice cream suffers from the same subtle, just tastes like sweet, problem as some of the others. However, the chunks of blond brownie really burst with an almost brown sugar flavor. But then there's the core...

The salted caramel core was something to behold. If this was gold, I would have been able to trade it in and buy myself a speed boat. In other words, it was HUGE. The first spoonful I took of it unearthed just how big this caramel core was, and I'll be honest, it blew my mind. The only problem with this ice cream is that the salted caramel was inconsistent. One bite, it was the greatest thing I've ever tasted. The next, it was borderline too salty. It went back and forth like that the entire time. That takes a few points away from it but in the end I'll give Salted Caramel CORE a straight up B!

So there you have it folks, I hope this helps you out when you're standing in front of the ice cream freezer on your next trip to the grocery store. All in all this is a fun gimmick, but given the choice between one of my usual favorite ice creams or one of these, I don't think I'd put back my pint of Milk & Cookies for any one of these. But they are definitely worth a try!

You should definitely comment and let us know which one was your favorite!

Don't forget, if you have any ideas for upcoming reviews, or maybe even your favorite hot spot for some sort of crazy burger or meal, feel free to email us at . You can also follow us on Twitter, if you are one who tweets, @fatguyfoodblog. Oh and we're also on Facebook! LIKE our page if you get a chance! Every month we give away a free shirt to one of our followers!

Review by Rich

Friday, March 21, 2014

M&M double review! Birthday Cake & Carrot Cake M&Ms!

If there's one kind of candy we can always count on putting out some wild flavors each year, I'd say M&M's are a safe bet every time. Usually they are released in conjunction with a holiday and sometimes even more than one flavor. Well the Fatguyfoodblog crew got lucky here in early 2014 because we have two new M&M flavors to review. Let's see what Rich & Mike thought of these...

Easily six months ago I remember seeing a small press release about these. The only image that could be found online was a tiny, poor quality version of the package. No other information could be found except that they would be out "FIRST QUARTER 2014." So that meant every time I went in a store I had to make sure to check the candy section to see if they had them. Well it finally paid off, because one fateful trip to Walmart, I spotted them, and grabbed as many as I could carry. 

Great looking package! Irwin agrees! 
But let's get down to it. When I eat something like this, a well known candy standard, that is now boasting the great taste of birthday cake, I want to pop one in my mouth and have that taste hit me like a Shawn Micheals superkick, right in the mouth.

But sadly, Birthday Cake M&M's do not do this. In fact, the first time I popped a handful in my mouth I thought, "is this a defective batch? These taste like plain M&M's..." But then as I was finishing that mouthful I detected a hint of a birthday cake taste. That's not what any of us wants. So I went back to the package and tried again. This time opting to just let one slowly melt in my mouth (Not in my hand. Not ever in my hand.).

Just three colors? Strange. 
This time around I got a bit more of the birthday cake flavor than before. But seriously? You have to slow walk them one at a time to get the flavor that is plastered all over the package? Not cool, M&M's, not cool at all. I would say aside from the strange three color choice of these , if you put them in a dish on your coffee table, visitors to your house might not even notice that they aren't regular M&M's. Some of the more observant ones might pick up on the fact that they are shaped a bit more like Peanut Butter M&M's, but if not, they definitely won't be jumping out of their seats thinking that they somehow just ate a slice of birthday cake without knowing it.
This looks like any other M&M. 
So, sadly, in closing I have to say that these are quite disappointing. These were one of the items I was most excited for in 2014 and they left me hanging. If you see one of the small packages and want to try them out, go for it, just to satisfy your curiosity.  But if they make a big bag, it's not worth the money. 
I give Birthday Cake M&M's a big ol' D, for "Deez thangs could use about 90% more Birthday Cake flavor!"
Let's hope Mike has better luck with his CARROT CAKE M&M'S!

As the sole member of the FGFB crew who loves carrot cake, I was tasked with reviewing these M&Ms- they even showed up on my food shelf out of nowhere. Gotta love that. 
I liked the idea, as there aren't enough carrot cake-flavored items out there, but I was cautious. How could they make a chocolate candy taste like carrot cake? 

Although they slapped the sexiest candy ever on the bag (seriously, those bunny ears straight from the playboy mansion and that come-hither eyebrow raise? mmmmmmm), I had to split her head right open and spill her candy brains all over the table. I guess I could have ripped the bag somewhere else, and not poured the candy onto a blood red tablecloth, but don't blame me! M&Ms are the ones who choose to advertise their candy by having lovable characters be terrified they're gonna get eaten in every commercial! Plus, these are clearly Easter-based, and you know... Jesus. 


ANYWAY, I felt these deserved a fancy presentation for something as fancy as carrot cake (and yes, I'm pretty sure the only reason I consider carrot cake "fancy" is because it's cake with a vegetable in it. That also means it's good for you, right?).

These are the white chocolate version of M&Ms (like these and these), which is most likely solely to make things taste more like they should, since there's probably no way to make real chocolate taste like carrot cake. 

And you know what? These are gooooooood.

They give off quite the aroma, and the smell is exactly the same as the taste- carrot cake. Not so much the frosting part of carrot cake, just like a more sweet version of the cake part. It really captures that cinnamony sting and almost bitterness of carrot cake, while staying super sweet, smooth, and KIND OF frostingy. I wish they had more of the frosting flavor, but I'll take what I can get. I figured these would be just ok, and after initial product testing, I felt like they were good, but not great. Last night, I really wanted some sugar and suddenly remembered I had this bag. Then I really got it. These are awesome, and the bag is almost gone.

I have to give them an A. I'd only recommend them if you are a carrot cake fan, but if you are, you'll see right away why I give them an A. They taste like they're supposed to, and they're delicious past the gimmick. I may just buy a piece of carrot cake and jam these in the frosting. Oh wait, I just did.

And it was awesome. 


Remember folks, you can drop us a line at with any ideas for upcoming reviews, or to just tell us how much you love us! Follow us on Twitter: @fatguyfoodblog for fun tweets from the road and mini-reviews. Or you can LIKE our page on Facebook for more fun, FGFB antics! 

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Cap'n Crunch's Sprinkled Donut Crunch!

Despite being over the age of 30, I have to say, I still eat Captain Crunch on a regular basis. Sometimes I mix it up and get a box of Crunch Berries or Peanut Butter Crunch too. I'm not that picky when it comes to the Crunch family. I know I can count on any one of them to become my irresponsible late night adult dinner at anytime. But here and there the Cap'n will try something different. Sometimes these are great, and sometimes not so much. But when I stumbled upon Sprinkled Donut Crunch in the supermarket the other day, I knew I would at least have to give it a try. I owe the Cap'n that much. We have a long and storied past.

Apparently the Cap'n now has the power to shoot sprinkles from his hands?

So if I'm reading this right, it's supposed to be a sweet breakfast cereal that tastes like frosted donuts with sprinkles. I can't say it's a bad taste for a cereal to try to mimic. But does it ACTUALLY taste like that? Well...kinda. I dove right in and poured myself a massive bowl. I don't play around with tiny plastic bowls. I need a monster bowl that I can pour a quarter of a box of cereal into. I also need it to be glass because when you write for the most popular snack blog in the history of the human race, you gotta snap those pictures! So I need to be able to see the colors the milk is changing. I need to see what sort of debris is collecting on the bottom. Luckily I scored these bowls a few years back. They are perfect. 

Like any other Cap'n Crunch cereal, they are pretty solid before you hit them with milk. Those of you who have weak mouths that get shredded by the Cap'ns cereal will find the same thing happening with Sprinkled Donut Crunch. Those of you who aren't massive wimps, who's gums can stand up to eating a simple breakfast cereal without ripping like tissue paper, shouldn't have any problems. But once submerged in milk, they soften up nicely. Ol' Grandma can slurp them up with her dentures out if you leave them sitting in milk for a good ten minutes. 

Up close they look kinda sloppy. 
Did they taste like donuts? Yeah. I mean, as much as a piece of cereal could. At first you think it might just be a regular sweet cereal taste, but then after a moment you realize that, yeah it does taste a bit like a donut. Enough to base a cereal around it? Maybe not. I enjoyed the flavor but in the end I think I would rather have a bowl of original Cap'n Crunch with a donut on the side.

Bottom line, I give Cap'n Crunch's Sprinkled Donut Crunch a C+. Nothing special, but not terrible. If you scoop up a box, you'll finish it, but you won't rush to the store to stock your cabinets before this limited flavor is gone forever.

As always, feel free to drop us an email if you have an item you think we should review. You can email us at . Also follow us on TWITTER, and if you have one of those Facebook things, you can Like our page and get all the latest FGFB news, plus lots of other fun stuff!

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

T.G.I Friday's Loaded Cheese & Bacon Fries!

I don't know if we've ever reviewed any of T.G.I. Friday's frozen snacks- maybe it's because their name is so annoying to type out, or maybe they haven't had anything new come out that widened my eyes enough. But now they have. And man, did these make my eyes wide.

I'm not the smartest shed in the toolbox, so the instructions on the back of this box were a bit tough for me to figure out. So, not only will this review fulfill its duty of entertaining you while telling you how good food is, it will also be instructional, step by step (day by day). 

First off, you want to lift here where it says LIFT HERE, which appears to be on the completely wrong side of the box.

And look at the deliciousness that's inside. A gross bag of meat and cheese, a gross bag of frozen cheese, and french fries. This has a long way to go to look like the picture on the box.

So the first thing you do is take out the bags, flatten the fries out, rip off the tab and put the tab on top of the fries like so:

While microwaving, I ran the bag of frozen cheese under hot water and lovingly caressed it like the sexy cheese it is. Then, once the microwave dinged, I threw the bag of frozen cheese and bacon on top, like so:

getting there

Then squeezed the cheese all over the top.

now we're on to something

For once in my life, I didn't feel the need to add cheese to a dish. This was a LOT of stuff thrown on top of these fries. After microwaving for another minute, I took it out and mixed everything up. Did it look like the box?

Yea, pretty much. But more importantly, did it taste like the box? 

good lord

Thankfully, no. It tasted like a delicious mess of crispy and warm fries covered in cheese sauce, melted cheese, and bacon. It's just as good as you'd hope it would be. Truthfully, I think I would have preferred more shredded cheese and less squeeze cheese, but the squeeze cheese both solidified a bit with the other cheese AND kept this whole mess nice and wet, allowing for faster inhalation of this snack.
I think my only complaint (and that's if I'm looking for one) is the bacon. While it's clearly actual bacon and tastes like actual bacon, I would have preferred if it were crispier, better quality bacon that was either in super shredded, bacon bit form (for crunch while maximizing flavor propagation) or larger pieces where some bites would have an awesome bacon flavor and others would just be cheese and fries. This mixed up enough that everything kind of just had that bacon-cheese-fry flavor without much differentiation of individual flavors. I'd also prefer not to eat stretchy, nasty bacon goo. 

You can have these pieces Mr. Trash Can- they're all you

But all big words aside (seriously, propagation??), these are just the right level of super fattening, completely over the top hilariously awesome deliciousness that I'd absolutely recommend them to anyone who would even consider buying them. T.G.I. Friday's absolutely got this one right. Not only that, but if you're not a complete slob and just dabble in slobbery from time to time, this is small enough of a dish that it works as a one time indulgence that won't make you too sick. And if you're a full time slob, these will make your face do whatever the hell mine did in this picture:

I give these an A-.
Points deducted for not having better bacon, but otherwise, these are pretty glorious.

-review by Mike

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Boston Burger Company

For months now we've been trying to make an excuse to head down to Boston to try out the Boston Burger Company. One of our faithful FGFB readers told us about them and once we took a look at the menu we knew that it was only a matter of time. Well a couple days before the new year we found ourselves heading down that way for the annual Hometown Throwdown, and decided we'd have dinner at one of the most talked about burger spots in all the wild Northeast. 
And sweet Mary, mother of God was it awesome. 
Feast your eyes on the Fatguyfoodblog review of...


The menu blew my mind. I wanted to try ten different burgers, but I had to narrow it down to one, so I looked for the most ridiculous, over the top burger on the menu, and that was clearly the one called THE 420 Burger. Yes, you see, this burger is one that stoners love, because it's a combination of a ton of their menu items, all in one place. Before I tell you what was in it, why don't you feast your eyes on it...

This thing is something out of a fat guys dream. 
I know what you're probably thinking, "Hey Rich, that's clearly photoshopped, no burger could be that big and yet still look so damn beautiful." I know. I thought the same thing, but I saw it with my own eyes. I held this beast in my own two hands, gently, as if it was a new born babe. I studied it from every side. Smelled it. Even brushed the bun against my cheek like it was a fine piece of silk. I did all this before even taking a single bite. But when I did, it was like a nuclear bomb went off in my brain. 

The 420 Burger is a slab of flawless Angus Beef, American Cheese, and Bacon. Then it gets crazy. They toss on mozzarella sticks, french fries, onion rings, mac & cheese bites, and then drench the entire thing in a golden bbq sauce. Go ahead and read those ingredients again, I'll wait....YEAH. It's that insane. The burger itself was a thing of beauty. The epitome of what a burger patty should be. The bacon was thick and crispy, the American cheese, plentiful. The weird stuff was where it really shined, it seemed like every different part of it added some great new flavor or texture.  The mozzarella sticks added a blast of cheese and crispiness from the breading. The onion rings, a quick onion flavored punch and more crispiness, and then the mac and cheese bites. They were the secret weapon. I was already freaking out with every bite I took, but when I hit one of these I full on put the burger down, closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. Also I suddenly wished I had gotten an order of them. Such an intense, cheesy flavor. Even Chester Cheetah would have finally hit his cheese limit and been happy for once in his life.

A beautiful mess. 

The only downside to this burger was the fries, which actually ended up being more like potato wedges. There were all these great flavors and textures hitting my taste buds left and right and then I suddenly hit a chunk of bland potato. It only happened once or twice, and believe me, it didn't stop me for more than a second. 
Also have to remark on the bbq sauce used here. They call it a golden bbq sauce, but I'll tell you what it was, straight up, the same sauce that is on the Gold Fever Wings at the 99. Which, is pretty much the best sauce known to man. If you haven't had Gold Fever Wings, go get yourself an extra large order, with cheese melted over them. Josh invented that. BUT THE SAUCE. They drench the burger in it and it adds a great sweetness that battles against the cheese, meat, and breading flavors like an army of orcs heading for the walls of Helms Deep. But in the end they all work in harmony, and create one of the best, and most interesting burger experiences I've ever had. 

Also had a chance to try a chunk of the Vermonster when one of our pals proved too much of a wimp to finish his. I don't blame him, you see, the Boston Burger Company doesn't make wimpy little burgers that are easy to finish. This was one of the other crazy burgers on the menu, it boasted Maple mayo, sharp cheddar cheese, caramelized Granny Smith apples, red onions, maple syrup and bacon. Since I only had a couple bites I'll keep this short. It was delicious. Felt like a burger I could eat for breakfast any day of the week. If I wanted to be completely stuffed at 9am. For fans of sweet and salty treats, this burger was excellent. However, if you aren't a fan of Maple Syrup, stay away from this one. 

In the end I'd have to say I give Boston Burger Company a solid A. My little nit pick about the fries on the 420 burger was just me trying to say something negative. I was not only pleasantly surprised but blown away by how good everything was. We had heard the legend of this place long before making the long journey there, and I'm happy to say, it lived up to the hype. 

Just looking back at these pictures makes me jealous of Rich's 420 Burger. There were so many on the menu that I wanted to dive headfirst into like an Olympic swimmer, but I had to pick one, and why not grab ahold of my own mortality, along with my nearest friend that's a paramedic, and hit the Artery Clogger.

This absolutely stunning specimen seemed simple enough, a deep fried beer battered burger patties topped with bacon, bbq sauce, and classic god-fearing all American cheese. The best part about this absolute beast is that it doesn't rely on gimmicks as much as much of the other burgs. This hard working blue-collar burger tells your sissy other friends that you don't like none of that fancy foreign horseshit on your burger, to put some motherf***in' beer on this motherf***in sandwich, and let's kick some ass. 

Everything about this Red White and Blue hero was absolutely stellar. The beer battered burger, which you figure would pour grease down your new Hold Steady tee, still maintained it's juiciness without making you feel like you're drinking a gallon of hot grease. The way that all these classic burger elements melded into one hefty flavor bomb of BBQ, meat, and cheese, sold me hard on this thing. The Burger was greasy and cheesy enough to swirl the BBQ sauce around in your mouth, and the beer batter gave it a slight crisp (which didn't last long) that gave you enough texture to keep you happy.


The only problem I had with the BBC, had nothing to do with the burger, but rather their attempt to not be typical and class up the place by giving you homemade chips and coleslaw as the complimentary side dishes to the burgers. As good as the coleslaw was, I mean, come on, chips? would Mike Rowe want chips with his burger? Would George Washington or Abraham Lincoln grab ahold of one of these burger perfections, look down at their plate, and be like "damn, I'm so happy I have chips and slaw!"
Nope. Wars have been fought over lesser atrocities.
I'm sure you can substitute it, I was so food anticipatory drunk that I didn't even think of it at the time.  I did however, get my man mitts on those Buffalo Cheese Fries which ended up being nothing short of incredible. If you're into the hotter end of Buffalo Sauce, you'll love these, but cool enough to be enjoyed by even weaker, non-muscle men...I'm assuming.

Overall I give Boston Burger Company an A. My experience with them is still fresh, and I've yet to even tackle another one of the 14 other burgers that I'd love to swim inside and come up for air and sing that song that Ariel did when she got her voice back, but you can bet your ass, I'll be back.


So there you have it. Both of us gave the Boston Burger Company an A. That translates into "YOU SHOULD GO THERE RIGHT NOW AND GET A DAMN BURGER!" Want to check out the rest of their insane menu? Here you go: . Plan a visit there as soon as humanly possible! 

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