Thursday, January 31, 2013

Taco Bell's Loaded Grillers

I'm not big on tacos and therefore rarely ever go to taco bell. But when I saw the ad for their new Loaded Grillers, I knew I had a trip into uncharted waters in my future. 

Spicy Chicken, Beefy Nacho, Loaded Potato. I wasn't psyched for the beefy nacho, but look at how good the others look!

I couldn't tell the difference in the wrapping and I now know that tortillas do an amazing job of hiding scent, so I opened the first one and bit in, giving my mouth a surprise.

For starters, these are pretty small, but they were also surprisingly big for only costing a dollar each. 

delicias del menú de dólar!

There's a glaring problem with these though, and it's something I didn't see until I bit in. See this picture?

How is that tortilla containing all that food? Are these hot pockets? Do they just fill up a tortilla tube with stuff and toss it in a bag? 

No. No they don't.

donde está la carne?

The glaring problem with these is that you had damn well better like tortillas, since half of them is just rolled up tortilla. I know that's pretty standard with Mexican food, but the ratio of tortilla to goodies is a bit off, and the difference between what they advertise vs. what you get is DRASTIC. 

Anyway, the first one was the Beefy Taco. At first, I hated it. It was just a glob of powder meat. The red chips were a great idea though, since they add a nice crunch to something that's mostly goo. About half way through, this got much better, since that's where all the nacho cheese was hiding. 

explosión de queso nacho!

I'm still not a fan of taco seasoned meat (and from what I've heard in the many Taco Bell tales told to me by friends, their meat is pretty low on the chart), but the nacho cheese and crunchy chips made this tolerable. I give it a C, but if you like Taco Bell meat, you'll probably like this more than me. 

Next up was the Spicy Chicken. My never-eat-mexican-food brain went all estúpido with this one, since, looking at the picture, I assumed this was buffalo chicken-seasoned. But nope, that sauce is just spicy sauce, and that white sauce I thought was ranch or blue cheese was sour cream. 


It ended up being kind of like a Mexican buffalo chicken wrap (similar spice), but it was missing something very important- MELTED CHEESE. Fill in the holes with melted cheese and this would probably be a lot better. As it stands, it's a tangy (sour cream) and fairly spicy chicken wrap with decent chicken and plenty of sauce. I didn't love it but may consider getting it again. I guess that gives it a C+.

Turns out I saved the best for last. The Loaded Potato was muy delicioso. It consists of potato bites with lots of skin on them (and nicely seasoned), nacho cheese, sour cream, and of course, the kicker- bacon. I may have been swayed because this one seemed to have less tortilla, but I felt like this one was pretty perfect in terms of how much of each ingredient I got. 

patatas, queso, bacon, oh mi!

This is basically a wrap where, instead of meat, it's just fried potato bites. So... a sandwich made of french fries. AWESOME. 

The nacho cheese and bacon work great together, and the potato tastes fantastic. I could have done with less sour cream- and I really mean less--

basta con la crema agria!

but generally, this one rules. I have to give it an A, and I sure hope it stays on the menu. They need something like this permanently on their otherwise just-whatever value menu. 


SO, in closing, these were mostly close to something awesome but didn't quite make the mark. The Beefy Nacho was good but suffered from its lack of non-taco-meat flavors, the Spicy Chicken drastically needed cheese, and the Loaded Potato was overall fantastic but suffered from hasty preparation (spread the sour cream around, high school dropout!). But all were solid, and for only a dollar each, a huge win. 

What they should really do (and I may just ask if they can do this) would be to add the crispy red chips from the Beefy Nacho one to the Loaded Potato. Extra crunch, another flavor... I think I'm on to something. Sure hope you're paying attention Taco Bell! Escúchenme, Taco Bell! Fatguyfoodblog sabe TODO!

el desorden.

-review by Mike

Sunday, January 27, 2013

LIVE STREAM review of the NH PIzza Bowl

begins at 12pm EST today! make sure to follow us on twitter for our live coverage...of, pizza. WHO WINS? WHO LOSES?
"When you play the game of pizza you either win or you die"-FGFB

bread, ham, cheese, and sauce is coming

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Burger King's New Chicken Nuggets, Cheesy Tots, and Molten Fudge Bites!

Man, I love when fast food places put out a bunch of new stuff and I get to use the "I need something for the blog" excuse to go get everything. Not that I need that excuse- after all, I think it's been so long since I've had a vegetable that my brain doesn't even understand what they are. But this time was special, since I never go to Burger King.

We have a constant war here at Fatguyfoodblog. I say that the only reason I go to Burger King is to get their chicken tendercrisp sandwich, which is probably my favorite fast food chicken sandwich. Then Rich says he loves Burger King since they have the best fries. Then I lose my mind and freak out about how they used to be different and good, but now they're just giant and boring, and what the hell are you talking about, Wendy's clearly has the best fries. This goes on for awhile, and it doesn't appear that it will ever end.

So basically, I don't go to Burger King that often. I was interested in trying their new chicken nuggets, but let's face it- I assumed they would suck, since, frankly, Burger King chicken nuggets have always sucked. I don't know how they've never figured out how to make good nuggets, but I can't remember them ever being good. That, folks, just changed.

They pretty much just stole good ole Ronald McDonald's recipe, but somehow made the connection between the chicken and the good part better. McDonald's nuggets, as solid as they are, often end up being blah chicken floating around in the crunch shell. These have a weird softness instead, connecting the two. It concerned me at first since I wondered if I was eating nuggets that hadn't been cooked enough, but I learned to love it and just assumed that they were actually cooked perfectly- that the softness was just the missing link between chicken and crunch that McDonald's struggles with so much. Are these better than McDonald's? Maybe... I haven't decided yet. 

I tried them with ranch, BBQ, jalapeno BBQ (odd- basically a very peppery BBQ), and Zesty, which was like spicy thousand island. The best combo, not surprisingly, was ranch and BBQ together. 

I give these bad boys an A- great chicken, great crunch and flavor, and a nice greasy softness that Mcdonald's lacks. The only real downside is that for now, they're only available in 10 or 20 piece portions. I know I'm a blob, but I like to treat chicken nuggets as a side order or a quick snack on the road. Hey BK, give us a 5 piece on the dollar menu, and we're gonna be friends. 

Who wouldn't want to be friends with this guy!?

I also tried their new cheesy tots!

These are also in larger quantities than I would expect, but were pretty awesome. They could be cheesier, but the potato is good and the crunch outside makes them exquisite. The only fast food place I'm familiar with that has cheesy tots is Sonic, and let's face it- they aren't very good. They're just basic tots with a plastic like sheen over them that we're supposed to believe is cheese. Of course I still get them every time I'm at sonic, but maybe I won't anymore, as these are way better. Dipped in ranch, they're pretty special. Gotta give these an B+. They would have gotten an A if they had been cheesier, but all in all, they're a great new addition to the King's menu.

I wish these were oozing with cheese, but I'll take it.

Lastly, for dessert, I tried their new Molten Fudge Bites. They also have a sundae with these on it, but at the time I figured I had enough food and wanted to see what these were like on their own before I drowned them in ice cream and the 2 inches of sauce BK is known for putting on their sundaes. 

In hindsight, I screwed up- I should have gotten the ice cream. These were a "oh wow..." snack at first, but the more I ate them, the less good they got. They're basically crispy donut holes filled with chocolate, which on first impression was glorious. But as I ate more, the chocolatey goodness inside that looked like frosting and tasted like pudding slowly seemed more like uncooked dough than anything. They're crispy, the sugar on the outside rules (there should be more), but the chocolate just isn't that good, and the gooeyness of it gets kind of gross after awhile. 

They're not terrible, and I may have screwed up by not eating them immediately (I feel like they're better when they're fresh)- they're just not what I was looking for. Close, but not quite a hit. I'll give them a C

Keep the new stuff coming BK!

-review by Mike

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Peanut Butter Toast Crunch!

If you're like most people, you consider Cinnamon Toast Crunch to be near the top of the Breakfast cereal food chain. It's simply one of the best. Always has been, always will be. Except for that little window of time when they released a reduced sugar version. It was so gross that it prompted a myspace blog entry from me years before food blogging was ever even in my brain. Yes I said myspace. Over the years we've gotten some different versions & limited editions of CTC. But it always seemed like there was one they were forgetting.

At Fatguyfoodblog, it's well documented that we are peanut butter crazy. If a snack or candy doesn't have a peanut butter version, THEY ARE FAILING AT WHAT THEY DO!
Well our pal Wendell the baker finally got off his ass and whipped up a new recipe for his beloved cereal. This time it's loaded with peanut buttery goodness. 
But let's digress a moment and talk about something else. What ever happened to the other two bakers? 
Just three buddies who liked to bake cereal...

A quick Internet search tells me their names could have been Bob & Quello (wtf?) but I also found another quote from General Mills saying they never had names. Interesting. Sounds like a cover-up to me. Seems like ol' Wendell wanted the spotlight, so he made the other two vanish. Not so hard to believe when you realize how crazy looking Wendell got at some points over the years...

Clearly a murderer. 

Ah well. The case is cold. Nothing we can do about it now. So let's talk about cereal! Peanut Butter Toast Crunch is...EXCELLENT. From the moment you tear open the box your nostrils are bombarded by a distinct peanut butter aroma. It will definitely make you raise your eyebrows.

The flakes seem to be slightly crunchier than the usual Cinnamon Toast Crunch Flake, maybe even a step towards a Golden Graham. But then covered in peanut butter, and sprinkled with that signature Cinnamon Sugar. If you're a peanut butter lover, you might want to savor them, eat them right out of the box, one flake at a time. You won't be sorry.

Drown em' in milk! They are faaaaaantastic.
Dump your favorite kind of milk all over them, and eat them right away. They are a peanut butter breakfast explosion. When you're finished, you're left with a strange peanut butter flavored milk, which isn't too bad at all. Don't let them sit too long in the milk though, much like their brother, CTC, these will get weird and soggy. Eventually to the point where the milk strips all flavor from the flakes and they are kinda gross. But let's face it, who leaves their cereal sitting that long on purpose anyway?

I'd say in all, Peanut Butter Toast crunch is everything a peanut butter lover could ever want in a cereal. Go get yourself a few boxes today. Yeah I said a few. I've already gone through two in a week. They won't be around forever!

I give Peanut Butter Toast Crunch an A! 
Review by Rich. 

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Keebler Filled Pretzel Bites

When you live in a tree baking cookies all day, you're bound to come up with some other tasty little bite sized morsels for men, women, and children alike.  Let's dive in and let you, the fashion forward, well kept, suave young go getter of a reader you are, decide whether or not these new snacks are for you!

Irwin seems unimpressed with the size of the bag, and how much his rug needs to be vacuumed
 First let me start off by telling you, at the store there was another option, Peanut Butter & Fudge. I opted for the white fudge to see if these do something slightly unexpected of them. Mike has a box of the regular fudge option. Be sure to check the comments for what he thinks of those.

As the box states, it comes with 5 little pouches, and within each one, rests 7 of these little fudgy crunchy morsels!

The milky "Bishop Blood" coating of white fudge on the outside was slightly disappointing. I was expecting these to be rock solid with fudge!

First bite into these and they tasted exactly how you would expect them to. The white fudge isn't as sweet as what I think a typical fudge would be, and adds a slightly creamy chocolate alongside the creamy peanut butter, surrounded by a distinct thin pretzel crunch. I tore through my little bag of them fairly quickly, but for the average joe who isn't always devouring one sweet or the other, these are a nice top off to a bag lunch or quick snack while you look at the latest news coming out of the Justin Beiber weed scandal.

Overall I'd score these Keebler Filled Pretzel Bites: Peanut Butter
& White Fudge snacks a
It doesn't rewrite the PB filled pretzel 
snack game, nor does it really innovate.
It's just good. 

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Ben & Jerry's Cannoli Ice Cream

First off, we all hope you had excellent Christmases or whatever you celebrate, outstanding new years eve parties, and we truly hope none of you made any stupid new years resolutions involving losing weight or not eating junk food. We had a solid 2 weeks of holiday merriment, christmas mix, stocking candy, and copious amounts of egg nog. It ruled.

After a little break, we're back at it, with another Ben & Jerry's limited batch: Cannoli ice cream.

most boring name ever!

I'll be honest- I'm not the biggest fan of cannolis. I don't get the hype behind them. 

They're basically like egg rolls filled with cream, and the cream is never that good. Every time I've had one, I always think that I somehow just had a bad one the last time I tried, and this time it'll be different- this time the cream will finally be butter creme or frosting, and I'll wolf them down like the glorious sugar tubes they should be. 

But they're usually not that good. The creme is just bland, oddly cheesy goo, and I'm always left saying "why do people even bother with these things?" SO, even though I always try to go into a review positive, I wasn't psyched about this newest of Ben & Jerry's flavors.

What is it? Mascarpone ice cream with fudge covered cannoli pastry shell chunks and a mascarpone swirl. First off, I don't even know what mascarpone is. 

Ok, thanks wiki- apparently it's an italian cheese made with creme. And the creme in cannolis often has ricotta in it. SO, Ben & Jerry's went with a sweeter, more buttery version of the creme cheese-esque flavor that's in cannolis, and in my opinion, it paid off. This ice cream is way better than cannolis. 

It's super buttery. Like, oddly butter-creme/vanilla-with-something-else flavored. I can't really describe it better than that, but I will say this- it is delicious and unique. And it should be eaten slowly like the cup of frozen sugar butter it is. 

I haven't seen a mascarpone swirl yet, but I'm not sure I will, since the swirl is the same thing as the ice cream. But I have gotten a bunch of chunks of fudge covered pastry.

Sometimes these are soft and gooey like some cannolis can be. Sometimes they're crunchy like a cookie. And they can get big. 


All in all, this is a pretty good ice cream that's different enough than their other flavors that it's odd they are just doing a limited batch. It's super buttery and very rich ice cream with either crunchy or gooey fudge covered cannoli bits. The ice cream is good enough on its own, and the variation in textures makes it even better. It's got enough connected to cannolis to call it cannoli ice cream, but not so much that someone who couldn't care less about cannolis (like me) won't still enjoy it. If you like buttery treats and something different to indulge in other than leftover christmas cookies, give this a try. 

I give it a solid B. Nothing mind blowing, but a generally a very solid new addition to Ben & Jerry's line. 

While I have your attention Ben & Jerry, I'm pretty bummed out you didn't take my suggestion in last year's Schweddy Balls post to make that ice cream seasonal. I waited all year for it to happily surprise me on the shelf come December, and it never happened. 

Maybe you're going to switch off every year? Next year will be Schweddy, then Cannoli again? Ok, I'm down with that. Or you could just, you know, stop making all your new flavors limited releases...