Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Ruffles Loaded Bacon & Cheddar Potato Skins Chips

It's been a sad 8 years or so since I last tasted the glory that was The Works. Ruffles created something special, and they were one of my favorite chips ever. Sure, loaded baked potato chip burps weren't making me too popular, but I downed them- bag after bag in glorious bliss, unaware that someday I wouldn't be able to buy them.

literally tearing up right now

Why Ruffles canceled these will forever allude me. Poor Sales? Losing money? PPPBBBTTTTT. I'm going to go with "you never gave them enough of a chance," "you didn't promote them enough," the more resigned "damn... people just don't have good taste when it comes to chips," or the most likely reason, Ruffles hates me and wants me to be unhappy.

Second to only Wild n' Mild Ranch Fritos (my favorite chip ever), I have missed these chips more than any human being should miss something many view as not really all that important. But they were some of my favorite chips ever, and I can't have them. There's nothing I can do about that (other than spam the hell out of Ruffles' facebook page saying BRING BACK THE WORKS. Oh yea, by the way, if you read this blog, you should probably go write that on their wall at least once a day)

Loaded baked potato chips... mmmm. Man I miss them.

So imagine my shock when, while on the phone with my Mother, she randomly said out of nowhere: "oh, I saw new Ruffles at Walmart yesterday... Loaded baked potato or something."

"Mom. Shut up. Right now. Think very carefully about what you saw. If you are right, this means something amazing has happened. If you are wrong, my love for you is in serious jeopardy."

"No, I'm pretty sure that's what it was. I'll look again the next time I go."

No need mom, I'm coming home. NOW.

She was close. They're Ruffles "Loaded Bacon & Cheddar Potato Skins" chips. To me and my excitement-seizure-in-Walmart-brain though, they're close enough to the Works that they may just be their second coming.

trying to osmosis the chips into my brain

Sadly, they aren't. But they're still pretty damn good, and for now, I'm going to have to accept this flavor as being close enough to The Works to tide me over until my facebook annoyance finally makes them bring back the original flavor (positive energy can change the world if you believe strongly enough).

They're good- they definitely taste like loaded baked potato skins, but they taste a little too close to Ruffles Cheddar and Sour Cream to be that drastic of a unique flavor (I do realize that those are 2 of the main ingredients to a loaded baked potato). I taste a lot of chive flavor, and the chips seem thicker than normal, perhaps trying to really drive home the potato aspect. I also felt like they actually captured the skin part of the potato skins. Pretty impressive. Sadly, the only time I tasted bacon was in my burps afterwards, where I got the joy of the classic fake bacon burp flavor. Yuck. For a chip to call itself bacon and cheddar, it should have a much stronger bacon flavor rather than the chive or skin flavor.

And therein lies the main problem with these- they just don't have enough flavor. What made The Works so awesome was that they were bursting with flavor- so much that they ended up being almost spicy. So much that casual fans of that flavor had trouble eating a lot of them, saying "they're just too much." I love that in my chips, and these need that. These are a very good side to a meal or a "oh neat, loaded baked potato" snack. But they don't have the devour-an-entire-bag-and-buy-more intensity that I want (and that these have).

So, you came close Ruffles. These are good, and I'll buy more. But stop teasing me with a lesser version of the original, and just bring back THE GODDAMN WORKS already.


Also, I have only seen these in 1 store, and for 1 day. I saw a ton of them together, marveled at the beauty of the display, bought them, and upon returning 2 days later, saw nothing. Not a single bag. The display had even changed. The way I see it, they were in 1 Walmart in Windham, Maine, for a few days. I almost feel like someone screwed up and put these out when they weren't supposed to be out, and I got a taste of something nobody else will ever see. I sure hope not. I realize that somehow, Maine has become a testing ground for chips, but I'd really like to get these in New Hampshire. Let us know if you find them anywhere.


Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Birthday Cake Oreo Cookies!

It's a first here over at Fat Guy Food Blog! We have many fans of the site, many friends and family that always talk about tossing their two cents into the Fat Guy Food Blog review arena. But today, we bring forth a new gladiator. A warrior who's words and tongue fight to give you, the masses, the entertainment you desire. Welcome our friend and Fat Guy brother in arms, Husky Heath, as he reviews the much coveted Birthday Cake Oreo's:

I first heard about these mysterious new Oreo's from a friend. ill admit at first I wasn't that excited because every time Oreo releases a limited edition or seasonal Oreo its just different colored cream filling but still the same Oreo flavor. its like a evil trick for my brain that the corporate suits at Nabisco get off on. When I see Halloween oreos with orange filling I immediately want them to be orange flavored but every year just the same old Oreo filling taste, Don't get me wrong I love original oreo's but I always want something a little different. Enter birthday cake oreos! Apparently on March 6th, 2012 Oreo's turn 100 years old. I had no clue people were enjoying oreos with milk in 1912. Anyway I was told these didn't hit shelves until that actual date so you can imagine how fucking excited I was when I was strolling down the aisles of my local market and the beautifully packaged cookies caught my eye displayed ever so nicely on a high traffic area end cap. I immediately grabbed 3 boxes, Why three you ask? because I'm fat and these are limited edition. My fiance grabbed two packages out of my death clutch and put them back on the shelves and just stared at me with the most disappointed scowl as if I forgot to buy her flowers on Valentine's day.

I love limited edition packaging 
I'm not gonna lie to you I wanted to take a picture of the actual unboxing for my first bite because these come in a different packaging than normal oreos which is smaller and has a resealable door with clasps. but the truth is I opened them in the parking lot. The second I opened the bag I was hit with a wonderful vanilla aroma. The same smell from all the store bought birthday cakes I received growing up, which to me was amazing. Nothing better than heavy pure sugar frosting.

As you can see I ate more than just a couple in the car! 
First thing I noticed when I actually looked at the cookie is that they have more filling than normal oreos and even have rainbow sprinkles in the creme.

Its hard to get the iPhone camera to focus when your hand is shaking with anticipation for the first bite. 

When I took my first bite I immediately felt justified for being so overly excited to see a new cookie. They are excellent. Think birthday cake batter ice cream but better! After I finished my first one and reached for my second Cookie I noticed that one side of the cookie is the same as usual but the other says Oreo 100 and has a single candle. Nice little touch. The best part about these birthday cake cookies is that They are filling for the opposite reason as usual. For me I get full of the chocolate cookie of the original Oreo but with this new birthday cake creme I taste more of that and fill up on it instead. Which is exactly what I wanted a different flavored filling for my Oreo.

(we got your back buddy) The should be a 400, with the letters "L" and "B" next to it cause that's what it'll make you!

In closing I would give this new addition to the Oreo family a thumbs way up for nailing my high expectations. My only advice is to go to the store ALONE when you buy these so no one is there to limit your take. After all these are limited edition and we may never see them again so stock up like you actually believe the Mayans were right and the world is gonna end this year!

P.S. I want to thank Josh, Rich and Dirty Mike for asking me to do a guest review for the site. Hopefully my post is half as exciting as Josh's.

(josh: I dig this dudes posts!)

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Weird British Chips Mega-review

WAY too long ago (sure hope chips keep well), a friend of mine went to England. Being a huge fan of FATGUYFOODBLOG, he smuggled some chips back for me to try. I was weirded out by them and put their sampling off for quite awhile.

This Christmas, another superfan got me for Secret Santa. So he decided the one thing I needed was more weird chips to sample, and got me 4 big bags full of mini bags of Walker's chips (basically the British version of Lay's). SO, it's time for a "Weird British Chips Mega-review." I will be adopting a rate-chips-by-facial-expression grade scale for this post. I've come prepared with lots of faces where it looks like I'm going to throw up.

First up, the least weird one: Walker's Cheese & Onion:

These stink. They smell kind of like cardboard. They kind of taste like cardboard too, with fake onion flavor. I'm not a huge onion fan, but onion rings sure can hit the spot, or sweet onion in the right dishes can be amazing. These are not a good representative of onion. I taste zero cheese either- just faint, fake onion that leaves for a horrific aftertaste. Not starting off well.

Not barf-inducing, but not good. D-

Next, Walker's Roast Chicken.

These also stink. I can't explain the scent, but it certainly isn't chicken and it's absolutely not potato chips.

I wouldn't call these good, but they definitely taste like roast chicken. Since chicken is a kind of sponge and takes the flavor or whatever spices or sauces you use, they definitely went for the roasted chicken skin flavor over the actual chicken. They surprisingly captured it really well. But do I want to eat chicken skin chips? If you're a fat pigblob, you may think so. Bite into a bag of these and you'll immediately reconsider.

A fun idea that I was excited to try, but sorry, these are gross. F.

Next, Walker's Worcester Sauce:

I love worcester sauce. Always have. It's a unique flavor that works great on chicken or pork. I make a homemade BBQ sauce where worcester is the second most important flavor. So how did it work on chips?

Fairly well, actually. They absolutely taste like worcester sauce and the grease of the chips give the illusion that they were actually soaked in sauce. The weird thing though- these chips are either way too tangy/sour, or worcester sauce is and I've just never realized just how much. I feel like these work great in small bursts, but after awhile, interest fades. These are very interesting though, and would recommend hunting them down if you're a worcester fan looking for an interesting alternative (or addition) to BBQ chips. I imagine mixing these with some BBQ would work really well. Hmmm... I put worcester sauce on chicken, maybe these will work with the roast chicken chips...

Ew. The chicken flavor overpowered any worcester and just made me like the chicken even less.

The face of "you know what? These are pretty decent." C+

Next up, Walker's Smoky Bacon:

These smell and unfortunately taste too much like fake bacon- like bacon bits or something. I've reviewed bacon chips before, and both of those were MUCH better than these because of an odd sweetness to the chips. These substitute any of that confusing sweetness with mega bacon flavor which works, but just isn't as good. The aftertaste is horrible and the burps hours later are agony. These also seem to be much more crunchy than any of the other chips... perhaps in an odd attempt to seem even more like eating actual bacon? Maybe. These are ok, but the aftertaste and lack of anything making them special (like "smokey" in the Lay's version or the inclusion of Sour Cream in the Ruffles version) make them towards the C grade and nowhere near as good as the much easier to find Ruffles or Lay's Bacon chips. BOY IT SURE WOULD BE NICE IF THE STUPID UNITED STATES WOULD MAKE A BACON CHIP SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO PAY 9 BUCKS FOR A BAG ON EBAY.

These are OK, but the least good of bacon chips I've tried. C-

Next, Walker's Sensations: Thai Sweet Chilli:

I'm a true American. I predominately eat pizza, chicken fingers, sandwiches, cheeseburgers, etc. I'm probably not the best person to be reviewing anything claiming to be "Thai Sweet Chilli." That being said, these were pretty forgettable. They had zero smell and not much flavor. I had to eat 4 before I even figured out what the flavor was. They're kind of bland with an odd spicy aftertaste. The spice isn't bad but the flavor is barely there and difficult to describe. I guess I'd say they're thai sweet chilli for people who want a very watered down version of that flavor.

Very blah chips. If you like thai spice, they are ok, but they just don't have enough flavor. D.

Next, "delicious... paprika flavour crinkle cut crisps:"

These were one from England and the only one with a "best before" date (October 2011), so this might be a mess.

Maybe scent is the first thing that goes when a bag of chips has sat unopened for 5 months after its prime... These once again had zero smell. These were surprisingly decent but mostly because of their blandness. These didn't punch me in the mouth with chicken skin or fake onion- these were just subpar, cheap potato chips with a slight little spice on the end of them- enough to give your mouth a little burn, but not enough for you to be able to tell what the hell you ate. I feel weird to be preferring a lacking-in-flavor chip, but it's nice to have something that isn't gross during a chip-eating party like this.

Not very flavorful, but nothing offensive. The Al Borland of weird potato chips. C.

I saved the scariest for last: Walker's Prawn Cocktail:

oh boy...

It took 4 chips for me to start gagging. I do not like seafood, and I couldn't handle these. They have a weird tangy, mayonnaise like flavor that disguises the fake shrimp flavor coming afterwards. I started to imagine eating small little monsters and couldn't last. Thank God for toothpaste and the fact that my mom gave me a bunch of candy canes for Christmas. These are AWFUL. F.

Oh no... What the hell flavor is this on my beloved potato chips?!

Oh no...

Ok, time has passed. These aren't THAT bad. They have an incredibly unique flavor, I'll give them that. I'd say they taste more like cocktail sauce and something else mayonnaise-y (maybe tartar sauce) more than shrimp. But there's definitely enough shrimp (sorry, PRAWN) taste that they fulfill their flavor promise. Maybe I just dislike seafood too much to give these a fair review.

These are definitely a polarizing flavor (half the people who dared to try them at the Christmas party hated them, half loved them), and further proof that potato chip companies have a lot of balls in other countries. Or maybe just other countries like weird flavors on their chips.

fakin prawn man

I'll say this- I don't like seafood, I don't really like Thai flavors, and I very much like chicken. But opinions aside, I don't really want any of these flavors on my potato chips.
Worcester Sauce were the clear winners of this chip fiesta, and that definitely says something- that was the only flavor where I was actually excited to try them- where it felt more like a unique, new flavor that would work as a flavor of chips rather than a gimmicky, "DUDE YOU GOTTA EAT THESE CHIPS EWWW" thing. Oh well.

Keep 'em coming friends. You buy them, I'll review them.


I'm a man who enjoys a shrimp cocktail from time to time, I found the prawn chips to be pretty tasty. They are a strange flavor though. They are mostly cocktail sauce but there is a strange aftertaste. Mike said maybe mayo, but I'm not sure that's it. It's hard to put your finger on it. But if you are a fan of shrimp, give them a try! You shouldn't eat too many though, they get to you after a while.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Ben & Jerry's Banana Cream Pie LIMITED BATCH!

Tonight I took a stroll through the supermarket. I visited my usual spots, eyes peeled for something new to review on fatguyfoodblog. I was coming up empty handed, but right as I was heading for the register, I made one last detour past the ice cream section.
It's NEW!

My eyes fell upon BEN & JERRY'S BANANA CREAM PIE, and I threw open that damn cooler door so fast it almost snapped off it's hinges. You know it's special because it has "EXCLUSIVE FLAVOR" and "LIMITED BATCH" emblazoned all over the pint.
So how is it?

It's...weird. Not bad...just weird.
The container tells you that it's Banana Ice Cream with Pastry Cream Swirls, Marshmallow Swirls & Pie Crust Pieces.
The Banana ice cream is great. Creamy banana flavor that isn't overpowering, and there's little tiny chunks of banana all throughout it. The pie crust is all through it and it's quite good. It's flaky and buttery. I'm not sure how they manage to put it in there without it getting soggy. It's quite the feat of science. I imagine Ben & Jerry in their laboratory like mad scientists, and they figure something like this out and high five while cackling with mouthfuls of ice cream.
So whats the downside?
Well the Marshmallow swirl. it's weird to put it in an ice cream that's almost the same color. The second the ice cream starts to melt a bit, the lines between marshmallow and melty ice cream are blurred and eventually you can't tell them apart at all.
Look at the detail! Like a sugary mountain range!
The Pastry Cream Swirl? It's a mystery. I haven't found anything in this ice cream that I would call a pastry cream swirl, whatsoever. Now I'm only about halfway into the thing, perhaps it's all in the bottom? Either that or it just blends together so much that you can't really tell the difference. Either way, I call that a failure for this flavor.
In the end, I think what Banana Cream Pie ice cream is missing, is chocolate. I know, I know, you're thinking, "leave it to the fat guys to want to add chocolate to everything. Whats next? Bacon?"
Well...Yes. I think bacon would be awesome in it. But let's not get off track. I think if they substituted the non-existent Pastry Cream Swirl for a chocolate swirl, much like the one in Haagen-Daz Banana Split ice cream, we would have a stone cold winner here.
I asked Irwin if he thought it was going to be good. He asked for a smell and promised not to try to taste it...

He lied.

Bottom Line?
It's a good ice cream. Solid banana flavor, marshmallow and chunks of pie crust. Fun to try out, especially since it's a limited batch item. You will be able to tell the tale of when you tried Banana Cream Pie Ben & Jerry's after it's long gone.
I give this ice cream a solid B.

Last night, while nearing the three quarter mark of this pint, I finally stumbled upon the elusive Pastry Cream Swirl. It was delicious! I took a spoonful and yelled out loud to Mike. It was kind of like the cream in the middle of a swiss cake roll, or cream horn. Thick, but very creamy. I looked around for more but couldn't find it. Looks like you get one Pastry Cream Swirl per pint!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

MINI POST: Choco Zucaritas / Chocolate Frosted Flakes

thanks to theothersideofthetortilla.com for the pic!
To be honest, I'm fairly ignorant to the ways and customs of our brothers to the south. I'm glad to see El Tonyo El Tigre smashing the barriers and celebrating Mexican culture by releasing Choco Zucaritas! Now, I MAY BE WRONG, but I'm pretty sure NUEVO means "steal" and Zucaritas means "the exact flavor from Cocoa Krispies" because that's exactly what the chocolate tsunami behind El Tigre, or should I say LA TIGRA (little spanish humor there) did.

The Cereal is actually not bad, Cocoa Krispies, and I'm cool with a flake version of it so, hey, why not!

no feet of rival gang members here!
I give this a:
mediocre, but, still has the good chocolate taste instead of the gross poison chocolate you'd see from genero brands

-el Gordo

Frosted Toast Crunch

Every single one of us knows the exact time when we realized Cinnamon Toast Crunch was the best cereal on the planet. Steadfast in flavor, hearty in sweetness, CTC (as I will so lovingly refer to it as from now on) delivered with every single bowl you poured. EVERY. SINGLE. BOWL. As a constant in the sugary cereal lineup, you could always look back and at the old friend and deliver a wink to those loveable bakers, even the often time bumbling Wendell, while you tried your taste buds on inferior breakfast flavors.

Imagine my astonishment when I saw CTC, venture into unknown territory and add this Frosted concoction to an already perfect recipe for mini cereal toasts. 

Wendell you GENIUS!

Upon opening this blue treasure chest, the sweet vanilla aroma filled the air. A blissful sugary perfume danced about my nostrils. I can only hope my 72 Virgins that await me after I blast myself to hell for Allah, would slather this scent on their bodies.

Ancient Astronaut theorists believe that FTC may have been offered to the Alien Gods

This cereal was fantastic. I do think that the folks at General Mills knew when they were concocting such a magnificent cereal, it would be too much for mere mortal man to handle, and with a heavy heart, they dialed back the flavors so that us, men of the planet earth, may be able to partake in a food fit for a god king.

Biting into a spoonfull of FTC was great, cereal had the appropriate amount of sog that you expect from CTC but the vanilla dusting that was meant to be showcased in this experiment, ended up drowning out most of the cinnamon, and tasted more like a weak marshmallow flavor. Which in all aspects is still fantastic, but FTC just doesn't deliver the same punch as the Alpha Cereal Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

somebody get me a scarf, it's frosty in here! no? ok...well. i tried.

Overall a solid offering in the cereal department, good for a simple man, who just wants to wake up from a hard night of sleep apnea choking, and enjoy a bowl of vanilla, marshmallowy faint flavorness.

you performed well my friend. thanks for the try Wendell!