Monday, August 22, 2011

La Festa Brick & Brew Garlic Knot Pizza

It's not often here on FGFB we review a local joint, but once you've read on and seen what glories could await you, you'll see why this just had to happen. Get ready for a magical ride of flavor. And if you're wearing sweatpants or mesh shorts, be careful, this post is the food equivalent to every AVN winner showing up to your home drenched in oil and ready to bone!

May I present, the greatest pizza known to the gods, La Festa's Half BBQ Half White Buffalo Garlic Knot Pizza.
They say it's 14" but it looks more like 20"
Now what you're asking yourself is "josh, why is this a split pizza? why not (insert asinine flavor and reasoning here)?". And my answer is this: Take two of the best kinds of pizza on the planet, and merge them into one ultra pizza, a flavor combo which both burns and sweetly satisfies. Don't get me wrong, these flavors alone could stand the test of time and rival any pizza your puny brain could try to bring against it, but these two together play off of each other like two buxom young teens in a pillow fight.

           -Braided garlic bread crust
           -BBQ side is chicken, onions, crispy bacon, and sweet bbq sauce that obliterates any of the tomato sauce thats underneath the thick mozzarella.
           -WHITE BUFFALO says the hell with tomato sauce, adds chicken, onions, circles of buffalo and blue cheese sauces swirling in an intricate dance of flavors upon a bed of cheese.
            -top the combination off with parmesan cheese and a garlic butter sauce, lightly brushed about the rim of the pizza

The BBQ side offers the sweet savory candy sauce your body craves

While the Buffalo side stings the tongue and delivers a stern, not overwhelming, amount of heat

This pizza is like a giant FU to all other pizzas. The crust is thick, its flavors numerous, its breadth, wide. If you are in the New England area, I highly suggest you call them up this moment, order one of these, ace bandage up those cankles, limp to your car, and pick this summmbitch up. A word of warning though, if you drive past my home, I'll run out in my underwear with a shotgun, blow out your tires and then blow you away for just a slice of this magnificent beast. This reeks of so much garlic a hound dog could track you in an icelandic ash cloud during a blizzard.

This clocks in at about $22 and is absolutely worth 5 times that.
 Google Directions from Boston, MA
La Festa Brick & Brew
300 Central Avenue
Dover, New Hampshire 03820-4133
(603) 743-4100 

death row prison pizza

I can't rate this high enough.


  1. I will now be using the Omega Rating as my highest rating possible for all gradable aspects of the universe. Well done.

  2. proposal accepted! fingers crossed you make good coffee.

  3. bahaha...*all* city folk make good coffee!

  4. yes yes yes. white buffalo x garlic knot is my favourite combination. La Festa is beautiful.

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  6. I want to bask in this Pizza's glory.. it looks...incredible. Like, the Gods themselves forged this Pizza Pie together out of their most heavenly of instruments... I can only imagine you ate this pizza as little angels playing golden harps floated above your heads.

  7. i have to say, this pizza is so god damn incredible that those angels would immediately drop to their knees and worship the pizza as their new deity. HASS brother, GO GET IT! GIRLDUST, we should photoshop the pizza on bikiniclad womens heads and hang them all over our rooms and chat on the phone to our friends about how wonderful they are.