Mainely Burgers in Central Sq, Cambridge MA!

Dozens, possibly hundreds of us working in or around Cambridge’s Central Square recently bid a bittersweet farewell to a mostly unknown joint called Four Burgers. The aptly named restaurant featured four types of burgers: turkey, salmon, black bean, and grass-fed beef. While the food was of great quality, it was a bit overpriced- a typical lunch time order of rosemary chips (which were, admittedly, nothing short of fantastic), a double cheeseburger, and one soda cost a dime under $15 without tax, and they never advertised any specials to my knowledge. So with a shrug, we watched them shutter their doors.

It wasn’t long before the murmurs and whispers of a new burger joint rose above the collective din of grumbling office worker tummies. A co-worker came to me asking if I had heard of the popular food truck from Scarborough, Maine, that was going to permanently park its business a few streets over. When I learned the name, the grumble didn’t come from my stomach.

The “Mainely Whatever” thing. Can that stop and go away forever please? It might coax a chuckle from a tourist the FIRST time, but as someone who lived in Maine for five years, this bit gets old fast. Sadly, just like so maine-y things in this region of New England, it’s time for change. But hey, then again, I’m a city slicker now- maybe I just can't wrap my head around the way life should be. 

this is in central square?

At first glance, MAINELY BURGERS felt suspiciously like a rebrand of Four Burgers, but I succepted to the ruse after taking in the restaurant’s wood-panel-everything décor, which was strangely comforting- like the square womb of a Tolkien Ent. There’s also a nice mural of the food truck driving from Portland to Central. All in all, the simple and polished atmosphere is a welcome juxtaposition to the Square. 

Two items on the list quickly caught my eye. The first, THE BEAST. On a list of menu items like the MB CLASSIC, THE SHROOM & SWISS, and THE ARRIBA!, this one seemed like the only choice for a Fat Guy Food Blogger. Also, the name reminded me of my favorite autumn themed protagonist- THE BEAST from Over The Garden Wall. Look it up and thank me later! 

However, the second and plainly named item I ordered… WILL SHOCK YOU! #clickbait

First thing’s first, THE BEAST. A burger with BBQ sauce, sautéed onions, cheddar cheese, pickles… and the much needed ingredient to make it seem substantial, bacon.

The most important thing, as I learned from reading many a FGFB post before I joined in, is the preparation of the only supplemental ingredient that would justify its name. This ingredient is, of course, the bacon, which was expertly cooked in my meal on at least two different occasions. The combo of crispy and chewy is surely enough to blow any so-called connoisseur of this sweat meat treat right into the middle of Mass Ave, to be quickly run down by an indifferent bus driver.

Everything else in the Beast fulfilled its expected it role in a satisfactory manner except for the sparing use of BBQ sauce. This is the second review in a row I've had to critique lacking condiments, but if there's no sauce on the table or at least packets in the bag, it's totally justified.

Which leaves the unexpected usurper to the Mainely Burgers claim o’ fame- grab something stable- BRUSSEL SPROUTS.

That’s right haters! Leave your ill-conceived notions in the 90’s cartoons your feeble belief system was conceived in! Doug Funnie and I will look upon your helpless husks and cackle! YOUR WRAITHS ARE DOOMED TO HAUNT A CROOKED PAST FOR ALL ETENTINTY, NEVER TO SEE THE FRUITS OF TRUTH TO BE BORN PAST THE INCEPTION OF YOUR WICKEDNESS!

Much like the Loch Ness, aliens, and Bigfoot (sorry Josh), it’s time to lay this urban legend to rest because FINALLY and WE NOW HAVE IRREFUTABLE PROOF (gotcha there tho) that brussel sprouts, when prepared CORRECTLY, are A TOP TIER AND FGFB NOTEWORTHY VEGETABLE. Suck it kale! You've had your day, now go back to whatever San Francisco vegan bistro and weed dispensary you crawled out of. 

This gluten-free breadwinner (I assume? Who knows anymore) commands the delicious flavors of garlic, brown sugar, and one unseeingly yet unmistakable overpowering other. The distinct taste of soy sauce adds the necessary salinity to deem this veggie snack-worthy, and yet I feel it was too heavy-handed, and distracted too much from the distinct brussel sprout flavor that distinguishes this snack from any other lightly-fried green vegetable. That being said, these were absolutely delicious, and I look forward to having them within walking distance on a lazy-afternoon workday then I do a hundred cheeseburgers.

The Beast: B-

While this was surely a well-crafted sandwich, it didn’t do enough to satisfy the savage urges one naturally feels when indulging upon a good-sized cow-puck. Two patties are an absolute must, which takes money from my wallet and points from my grade. However, all the usual flavor superstars come together to save the day, which left me with enough satisfaction to ward off buyer’s remorse.

Brussel Sprouts: A

Baby cabbages overshadowing meat is no small feat. This one truly earned the A.

Despite the slightly underwhelming burger, I’ll be headed to Mainely again soon. There’s a few other eye-catching items on their menu I’m keen to try- the Coop burger, their “truckmade” chips (we're supposed to believe a truck is driving these down daily?), and… here's another odd one- fried cauliflower?! Hey, like I said, they nailed the sprouts. Might as well see if they can glamour up another healthy food. My doctors would be so proud of me if I told them I ate two vegetables in the same week! 

Review by sl33zy

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Got a big ass hunger? Then you need a Big Az Burger!

There are times where you are on the go and find yourself hungry but with minimal options at hand. It happens to the best of us. You're cruising home, late night, after seeing your favorite band and partying all night and your stomach starts growling. You see those familiar fast food places blinking their neon light death rays into your brain and just the thought of it turns your stomach. Perhaps you stop at a convenience store to pump some gas and perhaps grab a snack there. You look at the candy, chips, and pastries and wish for something with a little more substance. Your eyes dare dart over to the frozen sandwich display and your brain tells you to stay away, because you've been burned before. But there, amidst all the unappetizing bland looking crap, you see something that stands out. What appears to be a giant hamburger that doesn't look bad...in fact, it looks...pretty damn good. Another step forward and the bold logo declares that this isn't any regular burger...this is a Big Az Burger! 

Suddenly, your night starts looking up. 

So when Big Az Burgers told us they were going to send us some burgers to try in the mail, we were pumped to try them out. So let's do it! Today we're tackling not only the Big Az Cheeseburger, but also the Kickin'Jalapeno Cheeseburger, and the Country Fried Chicken Sandwich! 

The Big Az Triple Threat!

First up, the Big Az Cheeseburger! This is how it will look on the shelf in your local convenience store. Actually, these guys boast that you can find Big Az Burgers now in almost every convenience store in America! Impressive!

So I unwrapped this beast and it's surprisingly hefty. Popped it in my microwave and a mere ninety seconds later I'm faced with a piping hot cheeseburger. That's not just a colorful turn of phrase, my friends, this burger was so hot, if I had taken a bite right then, I have no doubt that my face would have melted away like that one bad guy in the first Robocop movie.  Most of you probably won't have a problem with this, because being an even moderately smart person, you know to let your food cool before you try to take a bite. This is a skill I have never possessed. But somehow this time I managed to hold back, and it's a good thing! 

When I finally picked it up to take a bite, I realized fully that this is one BIG AZ BURGER. It's not one of those shriveled up monstrosities I've had before when stopping at a convenience store at 2am on the way back from a night out at the bar. This thing was serious.

So. Much. Cheese.

They come without any condiments so that's how I decided I was going to try them. I have to say, right off this burger has a lot of flavor. There's a generous amount of cheese on it too. This was something I was worried about, because usually frozen burgers that come with cheese have a piece on them that looks like it might be as big as a postage stamp and you can't even taste it. The Big Az Cheeseburger had so much cheese that I had to stop and marvel at it a few times.

My neighbors probably make fun of me so bad...

The bun was nice and chewy and held up quite well. The burger as a whole was soft and tasty and I quickly found myself finished with it and quite satisfied. It was this good on it's own, so I figure if I threw my favorite condiments on top, this would be a home run. We're off to a good start here!

Next up is the Kickin' Jalapeno Big Az Burger! If you're a regular reader of our fine site, you might know by now that I usually talk about fearing spicy foods, but then go on to tell you how much I liked the spicy items I review. It seems like I'm lying, but I swear, I'm not. Perhaps I'm simply becoming a fan of spicy foods and my brain doesn't know how to interpret it. Either way, I'll start by telling you I was a little worried that this burger would be too spicy for me! That looked like a lot of jalapeno pepper slices! 

There was a distinct difference in smell when I took this one out of the microwave. The jalapeno pepper aroma was quite strong, which made me slightly more worried about it being too spicy. But after checking out the amount of cheese on it, I was willing to take my chances. The Kickin' Jalapeno Big Az Burger has a slice of cheese above and below the patty. How awesome is that? Why don't we do that on every burger, ever, from now on?

Jalapeno overload!

Decided to flip up the hood and let you all see just how many jalapenos we're talking here. Quite a few! But after diving in, I can say, it wasn't too spicy. Don't get me wrong, by the time I finished this beast, I had a steady burn going, but it wasn't so much that it overtook the flavor at all. The jalapenos added an interesting texture to the burger and all the extra cheese really stood out.

Once again we find that my fear of spiciness ends up being false. I ended up enjoying the amount of heat this burger gave off and the general flavor that the peppers added to it all around. Again, this is a serious burger. I would say both of these burgers were easily twice the size of something you're getting off of a dollar menu from one of the big chain fast food joints. 

Now comes the wild card! The Big Az Country Fried Chicken Sandwich! This definitely had me intrigued after the two burgers. A quick stop in the microwave and suddenly I'm met with a huge chicken sandwich dripping with melted cheese!

It had the same chewy bun as the burgers, and my main concern when looking at this was that the breading on the chicken would be soggy, because, let's face it, that's the worst. But when I reached a trembling finger towards the breading, I found it crispy. All around. It wasn't just a fluke. The chicken patty was also so big that it protrudes from the bun on multiple sides. A hearty sandwich indeed.

A lot of these frozen chicken sandwiches can be a bit dry inside. But the Big Az Country Fried Chicken Sandwich ended up being pretty moist, which was a great combination with how crispy the outer breading was. Cheese? No need to worry. These guys are all about giving you a serious cheese slab every time!

Again, the Big Az name lives up to it's boasts. This chicken sandwich left me quite full and happy. I imagined that it would be great with a little bit of lettuce, and maybe some buffalo sauce. Or maybe bbq, ranch and crispy onions. The sky is the limit. The Big Az Country Fried Chicken Sandwich is excellent on it's own, but if you're a fan of cool sauce combinations or other condiments, they give you a great starting point to build from.

After having tried the Big Az Cheeseburger, the Big Az Kickin' Jalapeno Cheeseburger, and the Big Az Country Fried Chicken Sandwich, I have to say, I was impressed by them all. Folks, I've eaten some pretty questionable things in truck stops and stores on my various trips across the good ol' US of A, and I'll tell you, the Big Az Burgers make them all look like they aren't fit for human consumption. Am I going to tell you that they are better than a burger you're going to get at some high end restaurant that you'll pay $15 for? Nah, but that's not what these are about! There's a reason they have won the Convenience Store Consumers Choice Award multiple years. These burgers and sandwiches are there when you need them, and they are leaps and bounds above their competition.  Next time you're on the go and need a massive burger to quench your big ass hunger, remember this review and scoop up a Big Az Burger! Not only is it a hearty, tasty treat, but with a fun name like that, you can annoy your friends with endless "Big Az" puns. Who doesn't love that?!

Hold up.

One last thing before we go, since I had a few extra sandwiches to play with, I decided to create a monster of my own. Behold, the Mega Big Az Burger! That's right, I melded together not only the Cheeseburger, and Kickin' Jalapeno Cheeseburger, but also the Country Fried Chicken Sandwich! 

This thing felt like it weighed five pounds. It was so thick that there was no way I could possibly take a bite out of it. I began to think I may have met my match. 

A man faced with the impossible. 

But in the end, my jaw unhinged like a python and I was able to taste the Mega Big Az Burger in all it's glory. I'd like to tell you that I dug down deep and somehow found it in me to finish this thing...

Look at that intensity!

But that was not the case. I had to tap out barely a quarter of the way into it. It was a cheesy, meaty monster that felt so dense that I think if I pitched it at someone and it hit them in the head, they might be knocked unconscious. Bad ass. I failed the Mega Big Az Burger challenge, but if any of you readers out there think you can take one down, send us pictures or a video of you doing it and we just might send you some FGFB swag!

 For more information on Big Az Burgers visit their website:  www.advancepierrepromos.com 

For where to find Big Az Burgers, check out their Facebook Page: BIGAZ Facebook Page

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Review by Rich Brunelle, who currently lives in Seattle, but is known to many as New Hampshires favorite son.


*This is a sponsored blog; while the views expressed here were genuinely mine, consideration was paid to me by BIGAZ Burgers to review this product!

Mcdonald's Guacamole Burger!

I'll start this review by saying, I didn't always like guacamole. Hell, I straight up didn't like it at all. To me it looked like something someone might barf up if they were possessed by a demon. I tried it a few times here and there but just couldn't get into it. Then some shift in my taste buds happen and now I want to eat Guac seven days a week and twice on Sunday. So when I saw that the elusive McDonald's Guacamole burger was available in my area, I decided to give it a whirl.  

But when I walked into McDonald's I was faced with a choice. Burger? Or this NEW BUTTERMILK CRISPY CHICKEN! Of course I ordered it with the chicken. Two birds with one stone! I can try both of these things in one review, it will be great! So let's see how this Guacamole Chicken Sandwich measures up! (confused? Stay with me.)

Aaaaaaand here's my Buttermilk Crispy Chicken Guacamole sandwich. What's that? You don't see any chicken there? Yeah. Thanks McDonald's. You managed to get the box right, but somewhere between that and choosing between the burger patty or the chicken, something went wrong.

SO I GUESS I'M REVIEWING THE BURGER NOW. If you hadn't guessed already, this burger is...weird. The bun is the same one on the Clubhouse burger, and it's actually really good, but I'm a fan of fresh, chewy buns.  It's got a thick "beef" patty that seems to be the same as the rest of their larger burgers. Also you get lettuce (ugh) a slice of white cheddar, pico de Gallo, and the star of the show, the guacamole.

The flavor of the Guac is mixed with the pico de Gallo and what seems to be a large amount of lime juice, most likely to keep this strange fast food guac from going brown too quickly. So it's a very tangy, citrus flavor that really stands out. It's not terrible, but it's not really what I was hoping for. The guacamole itself seems somehow a little more slimy than usual? I guess it could be from the huge tomato chunks and fifteen foot sheet of lettuce they slapped on here too. Overall, it's an okay burger, but I was kind of wishing I had just gotten something with a lot more bacon and cheese.

I've never had guacamole on a burger and I don't think I will again after this. Not that this burger was especially bad, but because I don't think guacamole works within the burger build.  This thing was so slippery I had to be careful it didn't come apart in my hands. It was basically two pieces. Everything above the Guac, and then everything below. It seemed to shift and slide with a mind of it's own and by the end I tossed the final couple bites back into the box with my hands covered in green slime and declared I was done with it.

This might be a rare sandwich, because it's only available in certain areas, but if you see it in yours and want to try it, perhaps try the chicken instead. Maybe the breading will help keep the sandwich together a bit better, but if not, you're not missing much here, Guac fans. Perhaps now I'll turn my attention back to trying to get Chili's to bring back the Fire Roasted Corn Guacamole!

I give the McDonald's Guacamole burger a C-!

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WENDY'S BACONATOR FRIES!

I remember the day I heard that the Baconator was a real thing. That Wendy's actually had the balls to name a burger after one of the greatest movies of all time. An R rated movie about a killer robot that time traveled.  It really drove home what they were trying to do. One of them killed without mercy. The other? Had so much bacon that some mortals were begging for mercy before they finished it. The other big point is that the Baconator was damn good and it's so good that it's become a standard part of the Wendy's menu. Since then we've gotten SON OF BACONATOR. But, come on. Who buys that thing? The name is funny, but if I'm cruising the streets in need of a bacon packed burger, I'm going big. Or going home. To grill my own. 

So when word came down the line that Wendy's was about to debut Baconator Fries, you can bet I went straight to my local Wendy's. Where they promptly told me they weren't doing them yet. But probably in a few days. So I said...

Two days later I returned and saw the sign in the window, so it was on. Let's get to it! The Fatguyfoodblog review of Wendy's new BACONATOR FRIES! 

First off I'm going to give you the run down of what Baconator fries are. First up, they pop about a medium order of fries in one of these little containers. Then they pour a blob of liquid cheese sauce on it, followed by a handful of shredded cheddar. Then? Real bacon pieces are sprinkled across the top. Pretty cut and dry. I was kind of hoping that they would be big enough to be a meal on their own, but when I saw the $1.99 price tag I figured I'd have to supplement the fries with another item or two if I was going to round out a proper lunch...

Yes. That is a Baconator with a side of Baconator Fries. Why? Because one of our readers dared me to.  So why the hell not? If I'm going to march into Wendy's and take on the Baconator Fries, I might as well make it a handicap match and take on both of them. Well...I also got a four piece spicy nugget. When the guy asked at the end of my order it was tough to say no.

So the question here, after all this...are the Baconator Fries worthy of their name?

Well...they aren't bad! Let's be honest, Wendy's has great fries. It's hard to deny. So when you think of this, bunch of cheese and real bacon on good french fries, how can you go wrong? The answer? Cheese sauce. It doesn't taste particularly bad, or anything like that. It's not the cheap nacho cheese that you get with the awful nachos when you go to the movies. But it's still liquid cheese being poured over fries. So unless you eat these within thirty seconds of the cheese sauce being drizzled over them, you're looking at about half of your fries being soggy.  Soggy fries are enough to bring a tear to my eye...

The Sog factor. It's a very real thing. One that everyone who has ever eaten cheese fries could tell you about. So it seems like ol' Dave Thomas would be rolling over in his grave if he knew his places were serving people soggy fries covered in cheese sauce. What would solve this? USE REAL CHEESE. Like the shredded cheddar you already have on them. But...you know, maybe actually melt it. When I got mine I was eating cold cheese chunks sitting in cheese sauce. Again...not exactly a bad flavor, but it could have been so much better if the shredded cheddar was melted too.

I'm going to give Wendy's Baconator Fries a C+. Perhaps if mine had included melted cheddar I might have bumped it up a grade.  The biggest issue is the cheese sauce making the fries soggy. We deal with it, but none of us actually like soggy fries, even when they are soggy with cheese. Maybe an answer could be bacon and shredded cheddar melted over them, with a cup of liquid cheese to dip in? But in the end, these are just Wendy's making something new out of whats just laying around in an everyday Wendy's. They aren't bad, especially for that low, low, $1.99 price tag, but don't expect to be blown away.  In the end, this is still a pile of fries covered in cheese and bacon for two bucks. Still a pretty solid deal.

One last thing to add? The Baconator I got to go along with this was fantastic. So fear not, Wendy's. While these fries weren't a home run, you don't have to worry, you still deliver when it counts. I'll be back.

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BRGR BAR in Portsmouth NH!

When a place as cool as BRGR Bar opens up in our backyard, you know it's only a matter of time before we get the whole Fatguyfoodblog crew together and take a trip down there. How could we not? Cool name. Word of mouth told us they had an interesting menu. Word through the grapevine is that they also had crazy milkshakes. That's about all we needed to know. So here you go, we all throw our two cents in about BRGR BAR in Portsmouth, NH! 

RICH:  I started off my BRGR Bar experience by making a mistake I have often made in the past and will most surely make sometime again in the near future. I got a milkshake before my food. I know what you're thinking: "What a moron. That's going to fill him up like crazy and he won't be able to finish his food." Well, you'd be wrong. I did finish it all, but I simply wanted to die after from being so full. That being said; Damn, what a milkshake. I couldn't pass it up. When I read the words: Nutella + Marshmallow + Graham Cracker milkshake, it was like a voice from a primitive part of my brain spoke up and told me I had to get it. End of story. So how was it? 

It was like something you'd make up if you were offered three wishes from a genie. "Uh, I'd like Super powers, a trillion dollars and... A NUTELLA MARSHMALLOW GRAHAM CRACKER MILKSHAKE!" And you would not be disappointed. It was spectacular. Not too thick, not too thin, bursting with Nutella and marshmallow flavor. If you let it melt in your mouth you would find little flecks of graham cracker. Just absolutely excellent. When you get to the very end you get to slurp up a melted marshmallow that's slightly toasted on top. It's the perfect ending to a perfect shake.

JOSH:  You know what? I was insanely jealous of this thing. I'm more steak-and-potatoes-workin-man-thick and not a bearded man circle chuggin down sweets, so I opted out of getting one.

RICH: Nothing wrong with getting a milkshake with your burger and fries, Josh. It's a time honored tradition. Just because you're on a diet...

RICH: Despite telling me I was making a mistake and was going to feel awful after, I could see the jealousy in the eyes of Mike and Josh every time I took a sip and exclaimed to them how good it was. If you want some good advice from me, I'll dish it out right here. If you find yourself in BRGR Bar for a lunch or dinner, order this shake. I'm slapping an A+ rating on this bad boy with zero hesitation.

MIKE: He's right. I was jealous. I wanted to get a different shake or ADULT shake with booze in it. I wanted both, but ate before we went there since I thought the plan was for dinner, not a 3pm lunch! I may just stop in for a milkshake the next time I'm in Portsmouth.

RICH: For an appetizer I ordered up the Ricotta Sweet Potato Tots. I honestly didn't see how these could be bad and I was right. Upon delivery to our table, I was a little shocked at how few of these you get for seven bucks, but after slugging down half of that milkshake I was happy I only had a couple of these to eat after sharing with my fellow Fatguyfoodbloggers.

Crunchy outside breaded coating with a slight sweetness to it, followed by hot, gooey cheese middle. Excellent but very rich. I bet if you ate a whole order of these you would want someone to put you out of your misery. I, however would definitely recommend them. They get a B+ from me. The only downside is how few you get for your hard earned cash.

JOSH: Those were pretty good. I know what you're gonna say: "YEAH RIGHT JOSH YOU DUMB!" Just listen ok? The star of the appetizer that day were the Buffalo Brussels Sprouts. How could disgusting brussels sprouts be good? I have no clue, but the magicians at BRGR Bar somehow made these things into majestic flavorful beasts. The buffalo encasing the weird brussels sprout flavor was oddly satisfying, and dipping them into creamy gorganzola, just Michael Jordan dunked over Rich's lame ass tots. He said it to the waitress like Napoleon Dynamite: "Gimme yer tots." The flavor was unlike anything I'd had before, and was absolutely stellar.

MIKE: I'll eat something fancy or weird every now and then, but I'm generally an American Fatass when it comes to food- I like pretty basic, delicious, bad-for-me foods. I think I spit out the last Brussels Sprout I ate. The waitress kept saying "trust me, they're amazing." I don't think I would have taken the bait, but Josh is a weirdo who likes vegetables, so he did. They were incredible. I wouldn't even really say they tasted like vegetables- they were more of just something you could chew that was covered in delicious (and unique) buffalo flavoring. They weren't too hot, and they were oddly kind of sweet. And the gorganzola cheese was just fantastic. A perfect, messy mix of flavors. I have nothing but good to say about these things. 

RICH: I was very surprised that we even liked these. The waitress was very adamant that we try them. She told us numerous times that we would love them and I have to say I didn't believe here at all, but I was wrong. They were excellent. Such a weird, complex flavor. I'd definitely get them if I went there again, despite the fact that they look like something caught on an

"eat your buffalo brussels sprouts Tina"

RICH: For my burger I ordered the "OO-MOMMY," which boasts a Maine Family Farms patty topped with Gorgonzola, bacon jam, and crispy, fried onion rings. While there aren't a ton of choices on the BRGR BAR menu, I did find it pretty tough to decide which one to get, but come on, bacon jam? Onion rings? How could I NOT get this one?

Mike in the background is actually staring at my milkshake, longingly. 

The waitress said they recommend having it cooked medium, so I took her word on it, despite a nagging fear that it would be too rare for me. When it came out, it was a thing of beauty. Buttery bun glistening, massive onion rings bulging from the sides and the Gorgonzola slathered burger patty was practically still sizzling there on my plate. Since BRGR Bar is a little more fancy than your usual burger joint, I opted for cutting it in half, to lessen the chance I was going to have to scrub sauce or grease off of my shirt. After cutting it, I thought it did indeed look too pink in the middle. But after my first bite, my fears were put to rest. It was excellent!

Looked too pink, tasted tremendous. 

The onion rings have a bunch of thick batter around them and are full of great onion flavor. The bacon jam and Gorgonzola cheese melded together into a delicious sauce that I wish I could buy in a bottle. The bun was soft and chewy. I loved it all but the big deal ended up being the meat. So good. You could tell it's not processed frozen crap. This was straight up, grass fed local beef. You simply cannot go wrong with that.
I give this burger an A-. I enjoyed the hell out of it and was very satisfied. Why the minus? Get those damn greens off of that burger, man! They do nothing but take up space where there could be more cheese!

JOSH: Rich likes to blabber on, me I like to dip in and out, tell a few jokes, and say if the place was good. I opted for the "Poutine on a Portwalk"!

 

I ordered mine medium rare, and as you can see, it was a lot more rare than I thought it was going to be. But, being the man that I am, I powered on and still loved every bit of this thing. The burger consists of grass fed beef, fries, peppercorn gravy, melted cheese curd, and horseradish aioli.

Messy as hell and THICK

Is that just straight up raw meat?

yep it is.

JOSH: Biting into this burger, you find it's all the same consistency between two chewy buns. The flavors all blend together, and I honestly don't remember tasting much of the horseradish aioli, except for maybe a slight burn going on somewhere in the background. The cheese, fries, and meat all melded together to give the feeling you were biting into one giant delicious cheesy mess. The peppercorn gravy, which was also kind of lost inside the meat mess helped make sure the fries couldn't produce any texture. Don't get me wrong, as gross as it sounds, the burger had this quality to it that made that mess an absolute delight. The gravy and horseradish took me away enough from the cheese curd and meat to let me feel each level in my mouth. I'd 100% get this beast again, but maybe cooked this time to give the piece some backbone with which to stand. 

I'd give it a B. 

Was just great burger.  

MIKE: I got the same burger as Rich because it was the only one where I knew what every ingredient was. I'm not fancy enough for this place! It was good, but it didn't blow me away. I didn't taste different ingredients all that well, and the meat was a bit too pink for my taste. I still demolished it though, I'd just give it more like a B-/C+. I like my burgers trashy I guess.

Something these dudes didn't mention that is absolutely worth mentioning was the fries!

MIKE: We all got Parmesan Truffle fries, and although they didn't give us a ton, they were really good. I think we all forgot to take a close up shot, but they were pretty basic fries with cheese and seasoning that was really really good. They had a real herby taste to them, and they included mayonnaise- I'm not sure if that was for the burgers, or if we were supposed to pretend we were British and dip the fries in the mayo, but that's what I did. And it was fantastic- an absolutely awesome mix of tangy and spicy. They were served in a small metal bucket which was odd, but they could have been served in an old catcher's mitt and if they tasted as good as this, I'd have eaten every last one.

OVERALL EXPERIENCE-

RICH: I liked this place a lot and would definitely come back. Very interesting choices on the menu too. I feel like I could come back here six or seven times to try things that looked good. Also I have to say our waitress was phenomenal. I kept my receipt in my pocket for a few days so I could remember to get her name off of it for this review but ended up throwing it away without realizing what I was doing. She was so good. She knew the menu very well and convinced us to try something we were not going to try and it ended up being great. Not only that but she didn't attack us with 100 cliche waitress lines of small talk. She was great and she never let our drinks get empty. If I can find her name I'll edit this post so you can all ask for her when you go try them out.

JOSH: I agree, the waitress was incredible. The vibe to the place was small city chic (was I magically transported to New York City?) and everything in the place was its own creation. I applaud them in their creativity, service, and portions. I'll go back and definitely try to hit something else. maybe hit that shake that I made fun of Rich about. I'd give the cook a hearty clap on the back and a slightly too hard handshake while I stare into his eyes and measure his manliness with my ice cold gaze.  

MIKE: Josh's description of small city chic is pretty perfect. I absolutely felt like I was in NYC. The food is served on weird little metal platters with metal buckets which kind of made me feel like it was somewhere between hospital food and some sort of weird science lab, but I guess that's their gimmick. 

MIKE: I wasn't blown away by the burger, but I'd go back just for those brussels sprouts and a milkshake, 100%. Maybe TWO MILKSHAKES (I mean, if all I'm eating is vegetables, why not 2??)

Before you visit BRGR BAR, check out their site online and familiarize yourself with the menu!
http://brgr-bar.com/menus

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