Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Mountain Dew KICK START Energy Drinks

Man, was I tired when I got up today. 

Is there anything in the fridge that will wake me up?

Ohhhh snap! Mountain Dew Kick Start!

This'll do it! I'll be doing backflips out my window to dubstep in no time!

Like the classy gentleman I am, I poured some in the most badass pint glass of all time. 

And what's this? A second can? The King will take care of this one. 


Eh... It's alright. Irwin, do you want some?

Ouch. DISSED. Irwin decided to ignore it and go back to sleep. 

I think I agree with him. 

my basketball pillowcase rules

Mountain Dew Kick Start is Mountain Dew's attempt to make the perfect mix of a juice and soda into some weird, less sugary version of an energy drink. But this, unlike me, is made for the morning. It's got enough crispness that it's sort of soda, and small enough amounts so that it's sort of juice. They call it a "sparkling juice beverage," and that's pretty accurate I guess. It does contain a whopping 5% juice (amidst lots of chemicals) too, so it counts as juice. 

After some research and some math, based solely on the nutrition facts, this is technically better for you than mountain dew. A 16 ounce can of mountain dew and these are drastically different. 

Calories- Dew: 226 / Kick Start: 80
Sodium- Dew: 140 / Kick Start: 170
Carbs- Dew: 61 / Kick Start: 20
Sugar- Dew: 61 / Kick Start: 19
Caffeine- Dew: 72mg / Kick Start: 92mg

SO, if you're a really weird person who pays attention to nutrition facts when drinking Mountain Dew products, this is way better for you (other than sodium) AND has more caffeine, as well as fruit juice and vitamins C and B6, and Niacin, which I'm choosing to believe is good for me. 

Of course, you can easily get into the debate of high fructose corn syrup and sugar vs. artificial sweeteners- the old diabetes vs. cancer debate, and this may technically lose out. But then again, I have no idea what the hell any of the chemicals in Mountain Dew are either. Maybe a scientist can help. 

But who cares, this is FATGUYFOODBLOG. All that matters is the following: Were they good? 

Sort of. The orange citrus one tasted pretty much exactly like a less sweet, sort of soda-bubbly Sunny D. It had a weird artificial sweetener aftertaste though, kind of like the weird flavor in Sobe's Life Water (stevia and erythritol). It doesn't show either of those on the cans though, so it's something else. I'm not a big fan of Sunny D (is anyone, really?) so this one got poured down the sink. I'll give it a C- though, since it wasn't horrible- just not for me and the aftertaste ruined it.

The Fruit Punch was much better- tasting like Mountain Dew's own Code Red, if it was watered down with Hawaiian Punch. The aftertaste was there too, but it didn't seem as prominent. I think the fruit punch flavor was just much better tasting than the citrus. I drank most of this one while eating other stuff, and it was solid. I'll give it a B.

The question remains though, did this supercharge me and make me want to bust through the day doing a billion things with high energy? 

Actually, yea, it did. I like to pretend that caffeine doesn't have much effect on me- I am not a coffee drinker and if anything, will have a soda a few hours after I wake up. But I definitely noticed I had a lot more energy today, and I think I'm gonna have to attribute that to the KICK START I got when I woke up. I mean, jeez, look at how scientific I got in my above ramblings... that's gotta say something. 


These aren't incredible, but for the very small target audience of non-coffee drinkers who don't drink energy drinks and either don't drink soda in the morning or want to avoid soda for health reasons, but still want a super sweet soda-like beverage made by Mountain Dew, this stuff is PERFECT for you. 

-review by Mike


  1. Funny. I never knew until just now that I was in this group: "very small target audience of non-coffee drinkers who don't drink energy drinks and either don't drink soda in the morning or want to avoid soda for health reasons..."

    And those glasses rock.

    1. It's a small audience. I know 1 other person who doesn't drink coffee. 1!

  2. You are funny. I thoroughly enjoyed all the pictures. and for the record, I LIKE SUNNY D!
    also, now that I'm a food scientist, I could help you decode some of the scary chemicals listed on the ingredient list. And I will judge you less for your food choices. :) I think this will work out better.

    1. haha thank you. I think I can save you a lot of time though and just say that all of the ingredients are essentially poison. Sunny D? come on.

  3. Can i just say i love this blog? you guys are HILARIOUS. The grilled cheese with nutella haunts me to this day, i tell you! I seriously might have to break down and make one soon. keep up the good eatin', and if you ever come to the Bay Area, I have ridiculous amounts of tasty recommendations for you! :)


  4. Maddy!
    Thanks for the kind words about the blog! Always glad to hear people are enjoying it. Also, you haven't tried the Nutella Grilled Cheese yet?!?!?!?! What are you waiting for, girl!? It's amazing. We just made them again a couple weeks ago. If our travels bring us to the Bay area, you can be sure we'll ask your expertise about where we should eat.
    Thanks again!

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  6. Replies
    1. ive been drinking them for about 5 days now, the crashes can be annoying, but there not terrible, you will feel tired but unable to sleep kind of feeling.

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  8. Sigh, i love this stuff and i want more. but poison has been a key term in everyone review regarding this drink, but oh well.. it does get me so riled up i end up working out (if i can call it that) so maybe that counter balances it?