When Feeling Good Tastes Right: Laney & Lu's Cafe

As a Fat Guy Food Blogger, I can choke down my fair share of grease covered cheese with the rest of them. But there comes a time, albeit infrequent, when you'd like to not feel like the demons of hell are filling your guts with hot diarrhea, forgo the familiar decadent mouth fiesta, and feed your pig hole with something your body can actually use, instead of just pushing out a volcano blast of black tar.
I'm not sure if Laney & Lu's will love that intro, but if you find yourself in Exeter, NH. and want a feel good, freshly made food service, then by all means, Laney & Lu's is your place to go.

Nestled just on the north end of Exeter, this place offers quite the menu of freshly made brunch items.
First and foremost, let's talk COFFEE. Decided to go in and try their weirdest, most least capitalist pig loving offering. Turmeric Coffee.

Turmeric, steamed almond milk, unrefined cold-pressed coconut oil, pastured ghee, turmeric infused maple syrup, spices, blended. Alright, I get it, now what in the hell is Turmeric?

This guys website tells me that this ground herb is a great anti-inflammatory, as well as providing IBS relief, arthritis, prevents cancer, alleviates symptoms of cystic fibrosis, and if you already got the cancer, guess what? this shit helps STOP METASTASES!

HEY CANCER!

 
Kidding and as new-agey as this sounds aside, I'm pumped to give this super herb a try.

If you've ever had coffee made with any kind of oil, you kind of know what you're about to get into. A sip into the turmeric coffee ended up being an experience. The foam on top, served as a thick foam puck, which delivered a small taste of turmeric, foam, holding the spices close your nose, while you sip this slightly maple/gingery butter coffee. The taste was different but extremely positive. With most coffees, that foam top ends disappearing, but here, it stays put and continues it's function of spice and creamy scent delivery, making for a great breakfast hang out coffee.

Epic Egg Sammie

Next I decided to go ahead with their version of a breakfast sandwich. The Epic Egg Sammie features organic egg fried in coconut oil, locally baked Leaven sourdough, spinach, sliced tomato, pesto, local grass-fed raw cheddar cheese, avocado. Leaven breads been popping up quite a bit lately in the northeast, and with good reason. Their bread is thick, soft, and flavorful. The bread trifecta. This tastes absolutely delicious, a smooth bite of the egg and tomato, then wrapped up in cheese sharpness, while hugged by perfect bread. My only complaint would be the size of the sandwich doesn't really fit it's name, epic, at all. It's tiny, but hey you're not here to gorge friend, you're here to taste the wonders of the natural world not swig back a 64oz mountain dew.

And now, the star of the show. Not featured on it's regular menu, but a spring special, The Raspberry Tahini.

A thick slice of Leaven sourdough bread toasted and topped with avocado slices, raspberries, their homemade lemon tahini sauce, and mint. Hey Rich! They also offer Three Bakers Gluten Free ancient grain bread as well. I know how you only demand the most ancient of grains on your bread. The flavors all wrapped together and delivered a smoothly sweet breakfast toast, and when you think that maybe those raspberries would be too tart, the tahini douses those thoughts with a thick faint nuttiness, and refreshes you with a little hint of mint. Absolutely stellar.

The more I think about my experience at Laney & Lu's, the more I think that these foods are extremely well planned to deliver a fresh food experience. Creating that balance with the ingredient quality and flavor quality must be a delicate balancing act, and if there was a high-wire act named Laney & Lu I'd buy a ticket because these two have this flavor/body balancing act down pat. Thank you!

Turmeric Coffee: B
as good as this is, the coffee flavor is a little too slight

Epic Egg Sammie: B
rock solid, but this is FGFB, I'd like it larger!

Raspbery Tahini: A+
absolutely perfect, don't change a thing!

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Review by Josh, who currently draws pictures of aliens and the devil.
http://joshuaandrewbelanger.com / http://grimnorth.com

AFTER THE REVIEW:

Leaven sourdough with Avocado, tomato, radish

 The lady got this one, was good, but after biting into that Raspberry Tahini, I could see the disappointment with her breakfast choice!

FGFB New Years Chinese Food Spotlight: Pink Bamboo Hot Pot Cafe in Portsmouth, NH!

Chinese food is like pizza. Most of it is average but still satisfying, unless it is particularly fantastic or particularly nauseating (although, in both cases they can be at the time fantastic and later nauseating, especially if you have a tendency to eat it in the quantities that I do).  But in my opinion, the biggest difference is if you find yourself craving it on Jesus’ birthday, you’re SOL with pizza unless it was previously cold. So when we were brainstorming ideas in our weekly meeting at the Fatcave, the inspiration of a post-holiday Chinese food review struck me like the minute hand touches 12. That was intended to be a clock pun but whatever, you try of thinking of something being striking besides lightning.

Having a short window of time in my hometown of Portsmouth, NH, and not willing to be stuck (not struck) waiting for a table at a restaurant the weekend after a holiday, I decided to revisit a classic establishment I’d often enjoy after long shifts as a hotel front desk clerk in the very same city. That is, before I moved to the bigger city for an opportunity to make myself miserable in an environment crammed with approximately 500,00 more people. But my despair was welcomingly vanquished when I walked into what is quite possibly the most hidden gem of downtown Portsmouth, the Pink Bamboo Hot Pot Cafe on Penhallow St. Now try not thinking of what the minute hand touches every time I say Pink Bamboo.

Name jokes aside, I knew the Bamboo would be a great contrast to the disappointing experience I recently had during my last experience as a reviewer for the blog . In that, I was not wrong. The Pink Bamboo is a very clean, almost sterile restaurant with only few of the cultural knick-knacks that you’d frequently find in a typical Chinese restaurant.

Despite my appreciation of the atypical, I decided to go with a standard appetizer platter to maximize my exposure to the food and minimize the damage to my wallet (Christmas ain’t cheap). My selection was a platter that included three sticks of beef teriyaki, five chicken fingers, and four crab rangoons for a reasonable $9.95. It was a pretty nice day out so I ordered my food to go so I could take it to the park down the street. Also partially to get myself away from a possible second Scorpion Bowl because it’s important to be an unbiased reviewer (read: not drunk before 1pm).

I went for the chicken fingers first. They were good, but not the highlight of the meal. They were had a great crunch on the outside and were starchy between the meat and fried outer shell with an oily taste. The meat was thoroughly cooked. I was impressed that the chicken didn’t slide out of its fried casing 5 out of 5 times, an unfortunate common issue I’ve found time and time again at lesser Chinese restaurants.

I then moved on to the beef teriyaki. These were absolutely the star of the show, like the best beef jerky you’ve ever had but much better. I truly savoured every bite of these strips of paradise, which was tricky because of how fast I was inclined to eat them. They had a flavor of garlic and red pepper. Truly fantastic.

That left me with the rangoons, which were a delightful treat. The fried wonton shell was crispy where it should be, with a delightful crunch on the outer edges. The center was softer, almost a fried packet of cream cheese. I barely detected the taste of imitation crab, which again, at times with Chinese food can be overbearing. Overall, I found the combination of oily wonton and cream cheese to be buttery and delicious.

Then I got a message from my pal, Nick. I told him I was downtown sampling some food for the site, and he decided to come down and check it out with me. Time for my second Scorpion bowl, and the best item I had there all day. It was the pork fried rice and it was absolutely grand. The pork and onions were sweet, chives and bean sprouts added a flavorful crunch. There’s no way I’m not immediately going to get this dish every single time I come to Portsmouth. So damn good.

Pink Bamboo Hot Pot Cafe of Penhallow St, Portsmouth- you got the easy A. It was my pleasure to review this exceptional restaurant. This isn’t just some great Chinese place, it’s easily one of Portsmouth’s top five eateries- and Portsmouth has no shortage of eateries. But the next time you’re there, don’t get distracted by some place expensive place on Bow St. Go find Pink Bamboo, and the next thing you’ll be doing is thanking me.

For more info about Pink Bamboo, check out their website: http://www.pinkbamboocafe.com/ , and be sure to LIKE their Facebook page! https://www.facebook.com/PinkBambooHotPotCafe/?fref=ts

Review by Sl33zy

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EAT OUT WITH YOUR MEAT OUT: The Green Elephant in Portsmouth, NH.

We here at Fat Guy Food Blog venture into many a culinary world in our travels. I heard recently that humanity may all be the same soul, living out separate lives, experiencing countless things, and since time is not linear, we're all experiencing the world all at once, all one big entity writhing on top of one another for some mysterious, divine end. I'm not sure if I buy that, but I do believe in trying new things. That brings us here to The Green Elephant in Portsmouth, NH.

photo cred: portlandphoenix.me
I'm an idiot blogger and didn't even get a facade shot!

Thai inspired vegetarian food, located in the newly renovated downtown. I was somewhat excited to try this place. A few friends of mine exclaimed how good it was. As life long vegan and vegetarians, I figured their broccoli and wheat grass stained taste buds couldn't tell a grown man what was good and what wasn't! So I hit the bricks with the lady in tow, and ventured out to see what was so good about The Green Elephant.

Looking at the small menu, I was somewhat relieved. A typical Thai (or Thai inspired) place has menus as long as my leg, so going about and finding something was relatively easy.

We settled on an appetizer of Hot & Spicy Soy Sticks in a garlic chili cilantro sauce. Now, imagine my shock when this got sat down onto my table.

oh, 2...how convenient.

These have to be insanely good for them to be able to justify only having 2 correct? Well to answer that question, they were... pretty good. These little soy fake meats on a stick were prepped so well you'd swear they were just sliced off a weird exotic animal. The sauce was spicy, and delivered that sour sweetness you'd come to expect with anything labeled "Hot & Sour". It had a delicious, almost reminiscent of baked chicken skin, outer wonton type, casing.

The bamboo "bone" in the middle tricked my carnivorous brain into thinking I was eating animal flesh, and didn't once make me wish it was anything other than what it was.

The appetizer was good, but I'm still sitting their unfulfilled, and that's what appetizers are supposed to do, whet your appetite, and prime your body for proper ingestion of the main course. So I went with their style of Pad Thai. Something I'm familiar with at other places, of course it'll be good right?
You can also ask for your own level of spiciness, and me, not wanting my whole meal ruined if they went too heavy with the spice, went for a 3 out of 5.

The Pad Thai went as expected. Large portion, ingredients fresh and separate, not a stew of Pad Thai  in peanut sauce like I'm used to. The peanut sauce was not as sweet as I would prefer, and I 100% regret not upping the spice level. The 3 was definitely pretty weak. The Rice noodles were cooked perfectly. Not the best Pad Thai I'd ever had, but not the worst either.

After I finished my bowl of food, there was something definitely missing. I didn't feel insanely full or heavy by the amount of food that was delivered to my table, which I SUPPOSE is a good sign.

still hungry, I eyed the ladies Thai Ginger Noodles

In the end, The Green Elephant wasn't anything phenomenal. The price tag was high, even for food that is served and prepared this fresh. I'm glad a decent vegetarian option is out there for my friends, but I hope they don't alienate themselves from regular folk by having higher prices than a standard Thai place, which do offer similar things, but maybe not as "healthy". I'd go back if they had a cheaper brunch option or something of that sort.

I give the Green Elephant a C-

It's nice, clean, fresh, and decent food. But nothing I tried really stood out as incredible. Slightly pricey if you're looking for a nice dinner, extremely expensive for a quick lunch. More of a place you'd go to impress a date, but not really go because you dig it. I would have bumped them up a full letter grade if they gave you more than 2 Hot and Sour Soy Sticks. That's just ridiculous.  

-Josh

Throughout the meal sitting there, out of the corner of my eye, my inner fat guy just kept stealing glances out of the window, perhaps wishing he was another one of his past life soul tentacles, biting into something infinitely more delicious. 

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Goody Cole's Smokehouse! Authentic Pit BBQ

Depending on where you are in the country, the term "Smokehouse" might mean something completely different from one another. I'll leave my fellow FGFB brother living in the unshackled free state of Washington to handle those ones, but me, for now, will deal with another kind of smoke. One that makes meats taste out of this world, and makes you want to gorge yourself until you can't think straight........uhhhhh Welcome, my friends, to Goody Cole's.

 

Located in the small town of Brentwood,NH, about halfway between Manchester and Rochester, Goody Cole's Smokehouse sits annoyingly far away, but when you pull in you wonder how is this place so packed at 2 in the afternoon? You walk in, seating is an issue, so it's good to have another member of your crew be on table watch while you're in line to order. The decor is folky, complete with license plates littering the ceiling and walls.

claaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssic

They have varying degrees of simple BBQ plates, ribs, chicken, pulled pork. Nothing too fancy, just straight up BBQ. I was a tad disappointed looking at the menu, but you've got to remember what kind of place your in, and instead of fancy garnished bullshit, you get a plate full of meat, which I can respect! I decided to get a 2 meat combo, grabbing up chicken, pulled pork, which had a side of cornbread, garlic mashed potatoes, and mac n cheese.

you'll notice the sauces....more on that in a moment.

And of course, EVERYTHING about this meal was delicious. The chicken wings, which normally I scoff at and never order because, what am I an animal? Gnawing on a giant bone, licking ferociously at it trying to get every scrap of meat I can off of it? I'm a civilized human being who likes his chickens ground into a fine mush, processed through million dollar machines, the ghost spice of billions of dead chickens DNA catching on and grabbing hold to then be reassembled into a meat shaped tender, easy for dipping! But even without THAT, these chicken wings were cooked perfectly, crispy outsides, deliciousness within.

The pulled pork receives an honorable mention here, It tasted how it should, wet, thick, tender, but was missing something. Not bad, not exceptional just, good. That's where these guys step in:

idea for the next Pixar film

In the BBQ world, sauce is vital. I know there's a lot of BBQists who will bitch and complain that what matters is the meat, which, yeah, it does, but at the same time you can have quality prepared meat, but it can't jump that hurdle into greatness, without a great sauce.

The problem here was, NONE of these sauces were exceptional. I gravitated towards the vinegar BBQ sauce and mustard, but everything else, was kind of disappointing. That seems to be the story with Goody Cole's, it's solid, everything tastes great, the food, expertly prepared, but I feel that a place that has this much cred, should have blown what's left of my hair back. Fortunately, the supporting characters of this meal, knew that they had mediocrity to tend with, and decided to deliver the performance of a lifetime.

The cornbread was deliciously cakey, but wet enough to hold itself together, and delivered that rush of corn goodness into your mouth.

The mac and cheese, was what you'd expect from a BBQ joint, it had that odd cheese grittiness to it, but it had another layer of some kind of cheese (I'm yet to find out what) that smoothed it over, and turned this little guy into a key player of the meal. I'd be tempted to drive there just for this, but I'm pretty sure I'd swerve into oncoming traffic because there's no way it's making it back home.

Goody Cole's has a lot going for it. It has solid food, amazing sides, nice rustic atmosphere,

but as I was saying earlier, nothing to make it AMAZING. I think possibly

what might give the place it's long and storied rep, is the fact that they deliver that 

solid BBQ again and again. They know what

they are and do a fine job doing it, and that, I can appreciate. 

I give Goody Cole's in Brentwood, NH a

B
-Josh

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