When Feeling Good Tastes Right: Laney & Lu's Cafe

As a Fat Guy Food Blogger, I can choke down my fair share of grease covered cheese with the rest of them. But there comes a time, albeit infrequent, when you'd like to not feel like the demons of hell are filling your guts with hot diarrhea, forgo the familiar decadent mouth fiesta, and feed your pig hole with something your body can actually use, instead of just pushing out a volcano blast of black tar.
I'm not sure if Laney & Lu's will love that intro, but if you find yourself in Exeter, NH. and want a feel good, freshly made food service, then by all means, Laney & Lu's is your place to go.

Nestled just on the north end of Exeter, this place offers quite the menu of freshly made brunch items.
First and foremost, let's talk COFFEE. Decided to go in and try their weirdest, most least capitalist pig loving offering. Turmeric Coffee.

Turmeric, steamed almond milk, unrefined cold-pressed coconut oil, pastured ghee, turmeric infused maple syrup, spices, blended. Alright, I get it, now what in the hell is Turmeric?

This guys website tells me that this ground herb is a great anti-inflammatory, as well as providing IBS relief, arthritis, prevents cancer, alleviates symptoms of cystic fibrosis, and if you already got the cancer, guess what? this shit helps STOP METASTASES!

HEY CANCER!

 
Kidding and as new-agey as this sounds aside, I'm pumped to give this super herb a try.

If you've ever had coffee made with any kind of oil, you kind of know what you're about to get into. A sip into the turmeric coffee ended up being an experience. The foam on top, served as a thick foam puck, which delivered a small taste of turmeric, foam, holding the spices close your nose, while you sip this slightly maple/gingery butter coffee. The taste was different but extremely positive. With most coffees, that foam top ends disappearing, but here, it stays put and continues it's function of spice and creamy scent delivery, making for a great breakfast hang out coffee.

Epic Egg Sammie

Next I decided to go ahead with their version of a breakfast sandwich. The Epic Egg Sammie features organic egg fried in coconut oil, locally baked Leaven sourdough, spinach, sliced tomato, pesto, local grass-fed raw cheddar cheese, avocado. Leaven breads been popping up quite a bit lately in the northeast, and with good reason. Their bread is thick, soft, and flavorful. The bread trifecta. This tastes absolutely delicious, a smooth bite of the egg and tomato, then wrapped up in cheese sharpness, while hugged by perfect bread. My only complaint would be the size of the sandwich doesn't really fit it's name, epic, at all. It's tiny, but hey you're not here to gorge friend, you're here to taste the wonders of the natural world not swig back a 64oz mountain dew.

And now, the star of the show. Not featured on it's regular menu, but a spring special, The Raspberry Tahini.

A thick slice of Leaven sourdough bread toasted and topped with avocado slices, raspberries, their homemade lemon tahini sauce, and mint. Hey Rich! They also offer Three Bakers Gluten Free ancient grain bread as well. I know how you only demand the most ancient of grains on your bread. The flavors all wrapped together and delivered a smoothly sweet breakfast toast, and when you think that maybe those raspberries would be too tart, the tahini douses those thoughts with a thick faint nuttiness, and refreshes you with a little hint of mint. Absolutely stellar.

The more I think about my experience at Laney & Lu's, the more I think that these foods are extremely well planned to deliver a fresh food experience. Creating that balance with the ingredient quality and flavor quality must be a delicate balancing act, and if there was a high-wire act named Laney & Lu I'd buy a ticket because these two have this flavor/body balancing act down pat. Thank you!

Turmeric Coffee: B
as good as this is, the coffee flavor is a little too slight

Epic Egg Sammie: B
rock solid, but this is FGFB, I'd like it larger!

Raspbery Tahini: A+
absolutely perfect, don't change a thing!

Need to email us and let us know how much we rock? Do you want us to try your product? Perhaps looking for advice on how to step up dinner tonight? Want us to peep your dick pics? Here's how to reach us online:
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Review by Josh, who currently draws pictures of aliens and the devil.
http://joshuaandrewbelanger.com / http://grimnorth.com

AFTER THE REVIEW:

Leaven sourdough with Avocado, tomato, radish

 The lady got this one, was good, but after biting into that Raspberry Tahini, I could see the disappointment with her breakfast choice!

Limited Edition Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts!

Sooner or later every snack company answers the call of Bacon. Consumers and foodies love it. Pop culture has embraced it. Bacon is king and we all know it. But there are times where bacon makes it into the snack world where we scratch our heads and wonder if we ever needed it. Enter...Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts...

When I first heard about these I didn't think they were real. When I saw the box I thought for sure it was a photoshop job that someone tossed up online to get people talking. But then one of my pals back in New Hampshire let me know that they were real and he had tried them. So my search began. They finally showed up out here in Seattle and I scooped up a box as quick as I could. I was excited to try them but also expecting to be disappointed. How could the bacon work? Was it going to be those gross crunchy Bacos type pieces? Or would they go with something new?

Like most Pop-tarts, these aren't the best right out of the package. Some hold up better than others. I personally love Strawberry Frosted right out of the package. Many a camping trip have found me Straight Pop-Tartin' like a boss. 48 pack slung over my shoulder, slapping packs into the palms of my buddies as they woke up in the morning and crawled from their tents. But these? These you definitely want to toast up. It helps. Because the bacon is weird. It's a strange chemical sprinkle that kind of tastes like fake bacon and smoke. It's not overpowering, but it's not really the best taste either.

Luckily the maple inside is where these really shine. It seems like a flavor they should have been making since they started. Perhaps that's because I'm from New England and nothing makes me happier than Maple flavored EVERYTHING. But once you toast these up, they aren't bad! The bacon gives off a nice, little bit of salt flavor that goes well with the icing and sweet maple innards.

In the end I'm going to give Maple Bacon Pop-Tarts a C-. The bacon is fake and weird. But the Maple is pretty tasty. Toasted, they are alright. Maybe pairing meats with sugary toaster pastries isn't the best idea. As a man who loves bacon, I wanted nothing more than to tell you all that these were awesome and that the bacon revolution continues to dominate all it comes into contact with...but I would be lying. There are some times when bacon isn't the right choice. This is one of them.

Do you agree with this review? Disagree? Hit us up and tell us! Leave a comment here or drop us a line! You can also do that if you want to just tell us how kick ass we are. Or if you have a product you would like us to review. Or if you need us to clean up your neighborhood with vigilante justice. Here's how you can reach us:
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Review by Rich Brunelle, who currently lives in Seattle, Washington and spends his days being a one man neighborhood watch and tracking down elusive candies.

Canada Week post #2 THE CLAY PIGEON in Victoria, B.C.!

Being in Victoria, B.C. on the day after Christmas this year, I woke up craving a serious breakfast. I could have eaten leftovers in the hotel room or grabbed a bagel or scone at a coffee shop, but I was looking for a SERIOUS breakfast. Something tremendous. So we decided to walk around until we found the perfect place. One thing I'll tell you, Canadians take their holidays a lot more serious than a lot of people here in the States. Why? Because there were many businesses closed for a SOLID WEEK after Christmas. On one hand I was surprised because of how busy that entire downtown area was with shoppers and so many shops were closed. Aren't these business owners worried about missing all these sales? Apparently they care more about spending time with their loved ones and I think that's a lesson we can all learn from them. But luckily the Clay Pigeon were open, because when we strolled by and saw this door...

That's about all it took to convince us. Well, that and I saw that they had a breakfast sandwich made on an apple fritter!

The Clay Pigeon is a cozy little spot on a corner. The people working were very inviting and they sat us in a great spot by the window that had a nice heater below it. I always dig it when a restaurant runs with their gimmick. This place had some excellent pigeon art.

Of course I ordered the Frittwich. For a moment I wanted the Captain Cruncher. Chicken battered with Cap'n Crunch? Sounds awesome. But the Frittwich was calling my name. So I ordered that with a large orange juice because THAT'S HOW YOU DO BREAKFAST.

The food came out pretty quick and from the second they put the plate down I was impressed. This thing looked tremendous! Egg, maple bacon, smoked cheddar, arugula, and a homemade apple fritter.  Potatoes on the side. I've made some pretty wild breakfast sandwiches before, but never on an apple fritter. Could it be as awesome as I was hoping?

From the looks of it, they took the fritter, sliced it clean in half and then grilled one side of each. One of my favorite parts of this is how the fritter itself couldn't hold in half of these ingredients. They are spilling out in every direction with the top of the fritter perched on it like a delicious little hat.

The Frittwich was beyond delicious. I was a little worried once I started eating it because I usually prefer my bacon to be a little more on the crispy (burned) side. But I forgot to ask. But since this thing was made with such premium stuff, I didn't even skip a beat, the bacon was still delicious. Plentiful amounts of cheese, and the fritter itself was soft and buttery with a blast of sweetness. Not only that but there were chunks of apple in it every so often too. This sandwich was one of those ones where you have to talk about it after every bite you take. It was that good.

But let's take a moment to give a shout out to these potatoes too. Perfectly crisped on the outside so you aren't dealing with any of that raw potato crap that some restaurants try to pawn off on you with your breakfast. My favorite part was the big pieces of sea salt on them. Each one burst with flavor each time you crunched one. These potatoes were top notch.

I was quite full by the time I got this far in, but fear not, I finished it. A sandwich this good demands to be finished no matter how full you are. If I had keeled over in my seat from a heart attack and was laying on the floor, I would be reaching for that last bite while the paramedics were trying to load me onto a gurney.

I also had a chance to try their Fromage Trois, which is basically a grilled cheese with smoked Cheddar, gruyere, and brie on sourdough bread. It came with a side of tots. Fear not, I didn't get two meals, my lady got this and she is always nice enough to share in the name of Fatguyfoodblog. Tots were perfectly cooked and the sandwich was VERY good.

I've never had a grilled cheese with that blend of cheeses so it was quite interesting. Not to mention on sourdough bread. Great, but no Frittwich!

In the end, if I lived in Victoria I feel like the Clay Pigeon would be seeing a lot of me. It's a great little spot with friendly waitstaff,  and awesome food. You can't go wrong with any of those things. All the food I tried was spectacular and honestly if I tried to come up with one bad thing about the place it would be that the orange juice was awful. I don't know if it was the kind that you make from a frozen can, or just some cheap brand, but it wasn't great. But after them introducing me to the wonders of the Frittwich, I wasn't even about to sweat it.

If you find yourself in Victoria anytime soon, stop in and tell them FATGUYFOODBLOG sent ya!

For more information on the Clay Pigeon, check out their website: http://claypigeonrestaurant.com/

Don't forget, Canada Week is still going strong so stop by again later this week for more!

Just in case you forgot where you can reach us online, here ya go:
EMAIL: Fatguyfoodblog@gmail.com
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Review by Rich Brunelle. He lives in Seattle, WA with a lady and cat and a plant named John Coffey. Like the drink, but spelled different.

SOUTHERN MAINE: Lil's Cafe

One day, the little lady came up to me and told me about a place near her friends house, called Lil's. Lil's is a small brunch cafe located across the street from the entrance to the shipyard in Kittery, Maine. She went on and on about how good it was, and being the alpha male that I am, decided to try this place out for myself. So we ventured out to NH's northern neighbor, and I have to say, I was very impressed by this little cafe spot, and let me tell you why you should be too. 

a bountiful pastry selection

ALSO being the slow moving sloth that I am, I ended up getting to Lil's right after they stopped serving breakfast, which I believe is 11am. So if you're in the mood for a biscuit, quiche, or sausage egg wrap, I'd suggest you get there early enough. But I still was able to grab a coffee, and a pastry to warm things up before I went with something a little more lunch-worthy. 

I went with a Chocolate Latte (whuuu?) and what I heard they were known for, a crunchy cruller.
Normally latte's, coffee's, and espresso's come paired with a mocha flavoring, but the choice of homemade chocolate was interesting, and ended up being one of the best latte's I've had in a long time. The smooth chocolate delivered a much needed change from the weird off chemical shots of mocha that typical coffee places employ. The cruller, sweet but not so sweet you felt sick from a normal doughnut shop, had a slightly crunchy top, which helped you slow down from jamming the whole thing in your mouth like instinct begs you to. The cruller comes in at you, all sweet and awesome, the coffee then rears up and hits you in the mouth like

 Their lunch selection felt like your classic small cafe selection, but definitely didn't taste like one. 

she got some weird veggie thing which she SAYS is good, but not being a FGFB staff member,
who knows if her palate can be trusted...

 I got the Roast Beef with horseradish mayo, arugala, cucumbers, and cheddar cheese all on a freshly baked focaccia, served with house made chips and a pickle. 

 The roast beef was decently portioned, but much like the last two seasons of True Detective, there's quite a few stars of this sandwich. The roast beef, which you'd figure would be essential, took a back seat to the horseradish mayo, which provided a gentle heat among the fresh greens of arugula and cukes. The REAL main player of this sandwich though, was the focaccia. Normally focaccia is a little drier than I'd like from a sandwich. I often times exclaim "the wetter the better" like our pal Dirty Mike, when it comes to sandwiches. So when I ordered it on the focaccia, I was prepared to be underwhelmed.  Much like my favorite Wookie however, the bread over delivered, and ended up being flavorful and Chewie.

HONORABLE MENTION: I feel like the house made chips should be spoken about. They were pretty much your standard in-house chip, thick, salty, good, but nothing really differentiated it from a any other house made chip. Which in the end, is fine, and might work out because you don't want something TOO weird to distract you from the pleasantness already on plate. I get it, it's good, I'd get it again. 

 I can't exclaim enough at how great this place was. Not only in atmosphere, or location, but also in quality and friendliness. This place also caters to a much more hip crowd than I belong to. It has a small vinyl collection for you to peruse inside of an old bank vault, so if you're ever dying of hunger AND cultural enlightenment, Lil's might just save your life. 

I give everything about Lil's a solid A.

I haven't tried 90% of the menu, but the experience, and the quality of what I had there was definitely top notch. I'm already excited about the next time I'm in Kittery. 

-Josh

http://www.lilscafe.com/

7 Wallingford Square, #106

Kittery, ME 03904
(207)703-2800
hello@lilscafe.com

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Dunkin' Donuts Croissant Donut & Angus Steak & Egg breakfast sandwich!

America runs on Dunkin'. It's true. Television and radio tell you that if you live in New England, every five minutes! However, I usually don't head there unless I'm in a jam. Why? Well mostly because their coffees aren't my favorite. Call me a coffee snob if you'd like, it's okay. But you can't deny there's few places better to get an array of breakfast items at a cheap price. So when we got a few requests to review the new items at ol' Dunks, I stepped up to the plate. So here goes! Let's take a look at the Dunkin Donuts Croissant Donut & the Angus Steak & Egg Breakfast Sandwich! 

First up? THE CROISSANT DONUT! 

Single donut box?! You've got my attention, Dunks! 

First thing I noticed was this cool little box they put the donut in. I'm used to them slapping it in a paper bag and calling it a day. Well it looks like they are trying to step up their game and let you know that this thing is a big deal. You've got my attention, Dunks.

Hey now...

First thought? This is a pretty looking donut. But it just looks like a slightly bigger than usual glazed donut with a little darker outer layer and a nice criss-cross pattern that could be deliberate or it could be due to the cooling racks they put them on. WE MAY NEVER KNOW THE TRUTH.

But once you rip into it, it really shines. The outside is slightly crispy and then the middle is a strange hybrid of chewy and flaky. It kind of defies logic. If you didn't know what it was you were eating, you might ask, "wait...wait just a moment. Is this a donut or a croissant?" Seriously. They nailed it. There's an excellent sweetness, followed by a slight crispy crunch, and then a nice flaky, chewy inside. Was it as good as the donuts from the Stonehouse Bakery in Barrington, NH? Hell no. But was it easily the best donut I have ever had from a Dunkin Donuts? Quite possibly! Very interesting and they definitely hit their mark.

I would give this strange hybrid donut a solid B!


Next on the agenda...the Angus Steak & Egg Breakfast Sandwich!

Of course I got it on an Everything bagel. Why? IT HAS ALL THE FLAVORS. I will never regret not getting ______. Because instead I get them all. Now before I tackle this one, let's hearken back to a simpler time when Mcdonalds debuted their steak breakfast sandwich. I literally got it ONCE. Just one time. Because that one time I bit into it and so much grease filled my mouth that I could have dumped the Orange Hi-C out of my cup and filled it to the brim with grease. So gross. So that's been burned into my head and was all I could imagine here. But, I was wrong. This really wasn't bad!

The flavor was kind of fake, like you'd expect. Whenever fast food tries to do a steak flavor it just ends up tasting a bit like beef jerky. I also found that as I neared the halfway point in the sandwich the steak patty ended up losing integrity and starting to fall apart and even almost looked like shredded steak. But all in all I don't have much to say about it. I won't rush out and get another one anytime soon, but if I was hungry in the morning and someone tossed me one of these, I'd make it my breakfast.

I'm going to give the Dunkin' Donuts Angus Steak & Egg breakfast sandwich a solid C+.

Now? Here's a picture that is somehow absurdly creepy.

Don't stare too long. You'll be sorry. 

See what I'm saying? Man. Hopefully Ol' Donut eye doesn't haunt your dreams tonight folks.

REVIEW BY RICH

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